Where's Hammond when you need him? "Oliveeeeeeeer!"

@olds: Uh, yeah, if you took this as a serious article you really have missed the point of Jalopnik. This site is my source of choice for auto news because it is still able to have some fun with itself now and then. Keep it up Jalops!

Enzo Ferrari only built these cars to be sold to the public so he'd have money to go racing himself. I say bravo, and I think Enzo would say something similar... in Italian... well, zombie Italian...

It's a little known fact that nobody actually lives in Utah. Actually, most of Utah is mountains, barren desert, or national parks, the few folks that do live there stay very close to the cities, thus nobody really drives far.

That picture screams, "I was wearing a baseball hat sideways at the time of the accident, but the officer asked me to remove it." He doesn't seem that upset to be in a mugshot. My guess would be that he feels safer at the police station rather than home where his dad's head is still spinning from how much his…

@gla2yyz: It eats Trikes, which are kinda the fat assed SUVs of the motorcycle world.

The Jeep guys are getting to that point in the testing where they go, "Hey, can this thing do that awesome Lexus SUV snap oversteer maneuver? That looked cool on TV."

@P161911 probably shoudn't have: It's the Soprano Handle! You run away because there are angry men with guns waiting to 'whack' you sitting in the passenger cabin.

@Jon Vane: It's time for The Cool WallQ And first, we have the barbie Power Wheels in Pink! Where does it go?

She saw her own hair in the mirror, thought the car was on fire, panic set in, and she tried to bury it in the hedge...

@Cheeseslap: Ah, I see now what you meant, and it is a valid point. It is a shame vehicles like this don't have a bigger market here.

@Cheeseslap: Okay, given, I missed that, but still, my point is that under 20k that car does not exist in the new market. I'm not sure what point you're trying to make? The only CTS with more than 400 HP is the CTS-V, and that starts in the 60s. Other than that, 4 door powerhouse sedans in RWD only really exist in…

@jedimario: Well, that's always been more my point. With Luxury brands there's always some aspect of paying for the badge. you can get cars that have nearly the same features, and may be way more fun and involving, and generally have more character, for fractions of the cost.

I tell people to not buy luxury brands new, as their depreciation rate can be likened to that of the Titanic's maiden voyage.

@Cheeseslap: I would say the used market, as a 400+ hp camaro starts at 30.

These stats seem to state the obvious a bit. Teenagers are killed more often because they don't yet have the experience to avoid accidents. Old folks don't have the sharpness anymore to keep from instigating crashes.

Hey, look! it's everything that's wrong with the Camaro, with extra weight thrown in for good measure. Seriously, with the exception of the V line, Cadillac products anymore are just boxy money pits made to draw in basketball players and petty folks that want to be seen. I'm sure it'll look great i nthe background…

Is that a Lancia Delta with Martini racing paint at 1:35? Excellent.

This is what Tron would have looked like if it had been filmed in black and white.

Sign me up.