I take ‘em where I can get ‘em.

“Okay, I need one volunteer for the audience. You sir, what’s your name?...Okay Mike stand here. [Smashes elbow in Mike’s face] And when I count to three the foul will disappear. One. Two. Three.”

“We wanted Ben Simmons because he’s the perfect player for us to groom. Since he missed a season, we think Thibs can play him 67 minutes a game this year and it’ll all average out.”

1) Yesterday was not a trial. It was a job interview for one of the most exclusive and prestigious jobs in America. The burden of proof is only and entirely on the applicant to demonstrate he’s the absolute best person for the job. “Innocent until proven guilty” doesn’t apply. You don’t know what the fuck you’re…

Hey man, the horse didn’t have anything to do with that situation. He just wants a bucket of oats and maybe a carrot or an apple at the end of the day.

I'm tired and in pain and kind of emotional, but that second story of yours made me tear up. Just two people helping each other and being kind. Idk, it's nice to know that stuff is out there. 

Two stories: one triumphant, one that made me feel like shit -

It’s all just window dressing to cover tribal loyalty to her, because she was never taught, and never bothered to learn, that those words had any deeper meaning.

He pulled a “people are saying” right out of the President’s bag. Christ, what an asshole.

But I’ve also had a lot of people come up to me and question his effort and his energy level

I tried that kind of brie a few weeks ago, and the description is spot on. Definitely needs to be at room temp for maximum flavor, but it is incredible. A little goes a long way for me.

Oh I thought you were referring to a satisfied A’s fan

It’s interesting that a show about traveling to other countries and learning about the people, food and culture would be interesting to “coastal elites and hipsters.” Maybe he would have had more conservative/midwestern fans if he bombed every third country he visited.

I think some of it is noise and some of it is by design. I would be very surprised if he didn’t wind up with around 30+ homers by the end of the year—if I’m remembering correctly he’s had a few long flies that could have been homers with a little more luck, and those can affect still relatively early-season numbers.…

I would say he does get a lot of credit for his baserunning, but baserunning in general doesn’t get enough credit as a skill. It’s often treated as something anyone can get good at if they try; it’s one of those things “we’re going to work on in spring training.

He scored from first on a single earlier in that series too.

Somehow, he has been lost in the Trout-Harper thing, but he’s just as good.

They might, but more than anything these are just established patterns of behavior that show up naturally in these situations. You’d have better luck getting me a five year-old to stop picking his nose than you’d have getting these racist asshole cops to stop doing racist asshole things.

I think Flavor Flav put it best when he said:

I am not sure about Bryan Colangelo’s last two phone digits. However, I can confirm that Jenny Colangelo’s digits are *****09. Unless she changed it, which I begged her not to.

I like the way Snrub thinks.