Nah, man. They didn’t get left out because they’re not dead. They’re just in cryostasis, planning to repopulate the earth once The Undertaking is completed. Which is, for totes, a liberal hollywood conspiracy because HOW ELSE CAN YOU EXPLAIN THE OSCARS LEAVING THEM OFF? Eh? Eh?

I think the original draft had Roseanne waking up next to Bob Newhart.

Dear lord. They’ve just made Aaron the gay BFF for an entire town of women who have nothing but gripes against “their men.”

And to think, the only advice *my* mom gave me when she dropped me off at college was, “Don’t call home for bail.”

To the author: If you would like to follow up on this story I would suggest you contact the Baton Rouge charity “Lexlee’s Kids.”

Two notes I’ll post separately: I’ve got a pretty good guess about why the car seat wasn’t properly fastened and secured: You packed 4 people and 4 infants into a Nissan, with a notation that there were more people in the car than restraints. So the baby probably did get a seat belt to help secure the car seat but no…

Let us also remind him of his promise to sprint, unarmed, into an active shooter situation.

I would say Trump remembers many many things that did not happen to him personally. Ranging all the way from the greatest electoral victory in history, biggest and best crowds, his record-breaking amount of accomplishments in his first 100 days, clear up to that time he won Superbowl MVP twice in one game and became…

But you NEVER go full retard!

This makes perfect sense when you realize that the President thinks “Die Hard” is a documentary.

Out of curiosity have you ever seen any of McDonough’s other work? He’s primarily a playwright who rarely does movies. I enjoyed this one but not as much as “In Bruges” which was also oscar-nominated.

As I told someone else, he makes a lot more sense once you realize that his favorite documentary & favorite historical movie are both “Die Hard.”

As I told someone else, he makes a lot more sense once you realize that his favorite documentary & favorite historical movie are both “Die Hard.”

Cut the President some slack. This all makes perfect sense once you know Sweet Potato Saddam’s favorite documentary is “Die Hard.”

Assuming, of course, that he wasn’t suddenly stricken with a case of bone spurs.

Disappointed that this in no way explained or even acknowledged the best named Pope, Pope Lando.

Interesting!

Good luck with the rest of your term, Mr. President.

I’m not sure you read those articles. They’re about the byzantine nature of NCAA rules, how they’re confusing, and how this leaves loopholes. As in the article above, loopholes big enough to drive a ferrari carrying 100k in booster cash through. You might also note the difference between playing for a top tier D1…

With the occasional exception of signings I believe they’re already doing all of that.