Do you bless people's hearts?

only when i'm drunk or mad or with my family

Giuliana is a person of color. And that color is often orange.

You're not the Mayor of 9/11, you don't own 9/11. You don't own anything but the unique willingness to crassly exploit it.

What I learned from this is Allison Janney is fucking awesome and also Easy A is the best teen movie ever.

ikr? i had no idea

Pretty sure the cookware yelling match is real. My mother-in-law still remarks about how she misses her silverware that I now have when she is at my house - and it is the silverware sold in a bin 5-$1 at Wal-Mart. She once chased my now-husband around the house with a metal broom, trying to hit him and gouging the…

No. He just tossed it out there to make me angry.

cold, hard, shiny plastic.

I found a Le Creuset tea kettle for $5 at a thrift shop. Legit one of the best days of my adult life.

This weekend, my partner suggested that he might like to have a "Parisian Carnival" themed wedding, prompting me to hurl myself through a double-pane window. I am currently in critical condition. (He also wants a harpist who will play Lady Gaga.)

I was a dumb kid too! When I was 14 or so, I was given $10 and tasked with buying ice cream from Thrifty's for a cousin's birthday party. I completely forgot that freezer gallons of ice cream existed, so I went right up to the Thrifty's ice cream counter and bought 2 hand-packed PINTS of ice cream, which was not a…

I remember a show where a bear researcher had a gun because bears will stalk and attempt to maim and kill humans. A bear did end up attacking him on camera and he had to shoot it. So there are reasons, but I doubt this lady had a good one.

Yep, I think there are certain parts of Alaska where it's irresponsible *not* to carry a gun. That said, this shouldn't have happened.

I went to see one of the Harry Potter movies - we were in the second row. The man next to me had his coat over his lap. the coat was moving. The movement stopped, and then he left about 1/4 of the way into the movie. Pretty sure he was wanking off to Harry Potter.

Or we could always swap her in for those dumb kids playing hockey on the $5. Dumb kids....

YOU SCORED

Too bad for Harry. Just missed the opportunity to get himself into a relationship with English royalty.

Thank you my dear!

I guess that's true.