It’s only a matter of time before they refuse to go back in there.

As long as they can avoid any sudden gas leaks, I’m sure things will be fine.

“Smithers, release the bison!”

2! 4! 6! 8! We are not chelicerates!

There are plenty of reasons these days to make an Eagles fan such as myself yell and shake my fist at the clouds. But the fact that neither T.O. *nor* Dawkins made the Hall this year has generated a heretofore unknown level of rage.

It could have been worse; at least she wasn’t hit with a Mazeltov cocktail.

The Sports Reporters was always part of my bachelor-era Sunday morning NFL game day routine, while putting myself in the proper frame of mind.

The worst part happened when he discovered that Aaron Rodgers wasn’t actually inside the TV.

Greatest city hall building in America. I was there just a couple of weeks ago with the wife and kids.

Happy now, asshole?

They each have assets of more than $1.8 billion.

The Molotov-Ribbentrop Pact was certainly helpful afterward! For a while, anyway.

Close enough! Although be careful not to poach anyone else’s egg jokes.

That’s what I’m hoping for!

Missing: the 2nd letter, “M” and the fourth letter, “O.”

Here come the egg puns. Let’s get this ova with.

Clearly this man is not a Trinitarian.

What about his daddy’s Thunderbird? A white rad ride —‘66? ‘67, maybe?

And where the hell are my swan-shaped towels?