Yeah, dude, it’s not hard to figure out why everyone hates you...

He looks like he gave Bacchus a blow job.

This comes off a lot funnier if you read it in Obama's voice. 

Only if it’s dealing with the White Strawberry Cran, or White Cranberry Peach. The Cranberry Raspberry is just too bitter for my palette.

The best tweet ever:

agreed. i dream of the day when there are maybe 4 parties on the ballot and people say “ you know, these are pretty solid choices, i think B might do a little better than A, C or D. But i’m good with any of them.”

But not many characters better at using a pick.

I was so hoping the fires at the end would engulf Tegridy Farms and we could be free of that tired plot line moving forward and also ease up on the Randy-centricness, a little of him goes a long way.

Exactly. I mean, Biden wasn’t my first choice. But he’s fine. And held up against Trump, he’s the best fucking thing in the world.

Grandpa Joe, while not my first choice, is totes getting my vote.

I’m already putting money aside for the “Will you shut up, man.” statue I want placed in front of Trump Tower

Just as with William Barr jumping into the E. Jean Carroll case, Trump is going to use every lever the government has to stiff-arm his creditors. He’s going to turn the country into an extension of his personal enterprise, and will run it into the ground just like every one of his other businesses.

IF ONLY THE SAME THING WOULD HAPPEN WITH THE OFFICE.  JESUS H CHRIST AM I SICK OF HEARING ABOUT THE FUCKING OFFICE.

Isn’t that the Brady Bunch tiki?

Can we please let the Bayonetta deal go already? It would not have been developed if not for Nintendo, so would you rather have no more Bayonetta at all?

Nancy has no say, but I suppose they could simply crowd that end of the building for two months and tie up all the phones. Other governments have had open fist fights with chairs thrown; I’d say Republican politics is ready for that sort of a correction. 

They also have been securing PC exclusives to prove a point.

Personally I’ll go with with the disc version as I still like watching 4K blu rays. If I didn’t care about that I’d go digital, as that’s a great deal. 

If LAPD finds the shooter and instead of jail time gives him 2 weeks paid suspension, then I’ll be as upset about this attack as I am about all the other shit.