@badmutha: Um, vagina dentata. How else are you supposed to kill those boners?

@AmbiguouslyStraightUno: The only possibly acceptable end to that sentence that I can think of is "menstruate." And then I wouldn't be mad, but I'd be confused as hell.

@BringerofthePain: Now I'm picturing a woman standing in Trader Joe's and farting rainbows. And now I'm picturing a woman standing in Trader Joe's with rainbows shooting out of her ass, innocently saying, "it wasn't me." And now my day is happier.

I still haven't bought my Christmas plane tickets. I'm definitely going home, but every time I look at flights I end up going OMG I'M POOR and doing something else. Which makes the problem worse.

@immaculate.gaenor: I have a single pure white hair right near my part, so I see it often. I've named it Amelia. I'm glad that it looks like I'll be inheriting the pure white hair my mother's side of the family gets, but there was a freakout at first, like, "I'm not ready to be distinguished!" But my cousin started…

First, a public service announcement: if you go to Amazon and enter code mp34free, you'll get $3 worth of MP3 credits, but you have to use them by Monday.

Everyone heard of the Kick a Ginger Day fiasco? Well, they came up with a really bad solution: [laist.com]

@Oleander: I agree wholeheartedly, and I'd like to add that it's not just that this is a Google search and a decision by Google. It is the result of a concerted effort of a substantial (we can assume, based on the results) group of people to promote racism. So the idea that a lot of people were willing to put this…

@GiggleLoop: AngelFood Cake is the easiest thing known to man. The box mix costs $1, and the directions are: Add water. Bake.

@itsonreserve: I was talking with a friend about something similar to this recently, that if you're a woman and you're a good assistant, they say "we'll keep you in this job forever!" And if you're a man and you're a good assistant, they say, "you must be angling for a promotion!"

@Sev: I knew a production coordinator once who said making it as a writer was as hard as making it as an actor.

@cate3710: I thought maybe it was a typo and was supposed to say "preening."

The racial gap is even wider between more-educated women. Higher education is linked to a 30 percent reduction in stillbirths among white women, but no reduction in risk among African-Americans.

@jemma: @philtastic: @brenbrowning: Thanks for your suggestions and info! It's definitely good to know that changing a ticket is cheap, and I will probably be up for an adventure by spring (right now I'm so wrapped up in the holidays that I can't think about any other travel). Lots to think about... #openthread

@Rilo-Andy: *Applause* #openthread

So this is long and tedious, but I thought I'd ask for advice:

@LittleMissBossyBoots: I'm a big Dave Barry fan, if she's up for truly immature humor. #openthread

@MechaMech: I'm from one of those families with many cousins and aunts and uncles and we're all very close. I live 3000 miles away now, so I can't be home for every thing (not even every wedding, which makes me sad), but we often see my cousins' significant others at family gatherings. We know we can be an…

@kixiechic: Peanuts Dance! #cockbibsoutofbusiness

Wasn't there a Seinfeld bit about a cashier giving attractive women an extra $10 with their change, and the cashier was going to try to marry the first woman who gave him the money back? I used to think of that when I had a job where I had to buy bagels once a week, because like three weeks in a row the cashier gave…