That Lean On video looks like a Gwen Stefani appropriation revisit.

I’m real sorry the fucking CHEESECAKE isn’t healthy enough for you.

Question, if we’re already sitting down do we need to lie down or would you prefer standing up?

I thought that was a transcript of Jeff Sessions’ testimony from the other day.

Never forget, Ivanka is the “bag man” for the Trump Crime Family. Ivanka went to Azerbaijan to collect on the money-laundering project that was the Trump Baku Hotel. Ivanka also went to meet up with Putin’s girlfriend Wendi Deng in Dubrovnik in August 2016 - in the middle of a heated presidential campaign and leaving…

My kid dropped something heavy on our toilet, breaking it. YouTube helped me put a new toilet in myself rather than shelling out money for someone else to do it.

He looks like Spicer, but Spicer looks like an angry baby often.

You can actually ask for a referral to a pelvic physical therapist to do guided exercises and get better at isolating the muscles you need to, because a lot of women don’t do kegels very effectively and never realize they’re using the wrong muscles. There are also pessaries for when the muscles just aren’t keeping up…

I gave birth last Saturday, when I was only 25 weeks along, because my high blood pressure turned into preeclampsia and then HELLP syndrome in a matter of days. Original plan was to keep me at the hospital for as many weeks as possible before delivery, but my labs turned bad and then worse and doctors think I would…

Voters better fucking show up then too.

I think he looks like a Hobbit with gigantism.

Give Nicole Kidman an emmy for “Big Little Lies.” Her work on that show is astonishing. People talk smack about her face, but that woman commands the screen!

I was the maid of honor at a wedding that was, I felt, specifically engineered to make money from the guests. Familial guests were invited based on income, basically. It didn’t sit well with me at all. I was unemployed at the time and living in a relative’s attic. Basically I was at rock bottom, and now I was in the…

I hate to break it to you, but that’s from the chemtrails, not the breastmilk!

What Trump offers is less a Budget Proposal and more a Modest Proposal.

When Mulvaney said Meals on Wheels did not show enough results we misunderstood him. The results they want are more dead old and poor people.

Hidden Figures ho-hum?

Thank you for speaking for all of us down-trodden internet commenters who were so wounded by her vile, racist epithets.

Please, continue to be our beacon of light in this storm-tossed new world, oh sweet sweet SJW.

Save the outrage for where it’s warranted... otherwise you make us all look like schmucks.

Do the old gimmick of having Trump look in the mirror. Baldwin plays Trump; Rosie O’Donnell plays the reflection.