Not a real dog.

See, I shower after I’m done stewing in the bath.

I get the appeal of sitting in hot water for a few months (hot tubs are great), but not really doing so for cleaning. The few times I take baths, I shower first to clean off before filling up the tub.

This. Yeah, I’m gonna play “I told you so” too. Hillary may not have checked all the boxes as far as the environment, etc., whatever, but there was no way the gains that have been made in the past few decades were going to be wiped the fuck out they way they have been by Trump and his gang of shits. Instead of…

Unless it’s an adorable little coloured orphan from an impoverished developing country that they can use an accessory for virtue signalling.

Look everyone, Mike Rosenberg is here!

I have tried both and like them both for different reasons.

A good, well-prepared impossible burger is pretty much dead-on. I took a friend of mine who does eat meat still, and he said that if I have not told him it was an impossible Burger that he would never have known. I also like the beyond, but to me it has a little bit more of a tell, something in the aftertaste.…

I think Impossible has a bit of an edge....it has more of a meaty/beefy flavor and texture in my opinion, and Beyond has a bit of an unpleasant aftertaste, though, that’s all we can get at the supermarket near us, so we have those most often.

Please tell me that you are fully aware of how stupid you sound.

They didn’t really want to drain the swamp. They just wanted to fill it with their own alligators.

I cannot get enough of this girl and am dying for a documentary about her. I am endlessly fascinated by grifters and the psychology behind their shameless, fearless need to lie about shit.

Even if the orange blob drops dead tomorrow, people will be dealing with the Trump Presidency for decades to come.

Reading this collection of raving lunacy only reinforces my belief that, should he lose in 2020, he’s going to have a full on DEFCON 1 nervous breakdown, and that November 2020 to January 2021 has the potential to be the very definition of “Katie bar the door.”

Are you 12 or just Republican?

Lol, maybe she's from Florida.  We have portables at all the schools. They're basically square trailers that hold extra classrooms because we can't seem to predict population growth. 

That’s still no excuse to try and impress Paul Ryan!

What didn’t I do to get the attention of my childhood crushes? There are so many cringy stories, but I think one of my favorites was when I convinced my group of friends in middle school to all take turns licking the same Blow Pop. I made sure to lick the Blow Pop right after my crush did so I could get his saliva in…

I’m pretty sure Conway believes what he is saying. Remember, Conway’s not pretending he’s a member of the “woke” resistance. Conway’s just a really conservative lawyer who never stopped being a really conservative lawyer.

Goddammit Ingraham. You made me pick Team Bieber, you dumb Nazi bitch.