Listen, the very notion that they’re genuinely “doing” anything is flattering to them. If they were serious about some sort of insurrection against government, they could—would—have picked virtually any other building in North America to start it. They don’t want a fight. They want to get interviewed on Fox News.

Had this happened to me and they drew a Dickbutt instead, I wouldn’t even be mad, I’d be amazed.

I never took trademark law, but does the fact that an identifiable group of people were actually offended enough to take it to court in the first place factor into the calculus at all? Because although klitoris and Make Your Own Dildo may be offensive, its hard to know who it offends unless they reveal themselves (so…

I’m gonna be that guy: I-280 is up on the Peninsula in the Bay Area, not LA.

It’s like you’ve never met a 20 year old guy before.

It takes a lot for me to yell “Holy shit!” at 3 in the morning by myself, risking my significant other’s wrath if I’d woken her, but man. Holy shit. Dale Jr was obviously shaken in the Victory Lane interview, and I think it’s apparent why that sort of crash at this specific track would be particularly upsetting for…

Fuck the NFL. They take themselves too seriously.

I don't know, I kind of look the same way after 420.

It doesn't work that way. The officials inflate both teams' balls—to the psi requested by each team. So unless the officials fucked-up big-time, both the Colts' and Pats' balls started life in the 12.5-13.5 psi range.

It's crazy that you think the casual PSP owner even KNOWS that they can hack their system.

What the hell kind of poop water is solid goddamn black like that? Not any poop water I've ever seen!

It's really not. You slide off a cover, undo a screw and your in.

enter console and enter cht_bEnableCheats = 3 and teleport to the next floor

Thought someone actually made some kind of puzzle/adventure game about actual Black Beard-y pirates trapped in an actual elevator. Kinda disappointed.

Jesus I forgot how hideous the original Xbox interface was. Everything about that console in terms of aesthetics was like if someone took a fictional game console from a TV show made by people who didn't understand videogames and then made it a reality. Hell even the name is kind of like that.

Ubisoft, EA, Microsoft, must I go on further?

Thankfully, my diagnosis came at the Ohio State Student Health Center. The downside is, they describe everything in B1G terms. "Your prostate is supposed to be the size of a large buckeye, but it is unfortunately closer to the balled up paw of a nittany lion. You're lucky we caught it before it grew to the size of a…

"Pro...cedure??? What is this pro...cedure?"

The blood clot will take months to resolve. I had what you had, except times 100. Though the procedure was a piece of cake (even drove myself to and fro). My, uh, aftermath was a a fucking disaster. Though I had no external bleeding from my incisions (not even stitched)but some fucking part of my groin decided to…

For future vasectomy recipients, don't do what I did, and go out drinking the instant you get your clothes back on.