Of course he’s not in the SEC, Noah. He was on a championship team! Didn’t you hear the SEC decided to quit winning championships?

NYC’s bikeshare program is great and I hope Philly enjoys theirs too.

That’s my go-to move every time I get caught masturbating.

Crowder is fortunate, he now has until October for his ouchie to heal.

“Sincerely hoping there’s an orthopedic doc in the locker room ready to pop Love’s should back into the socket, and a trainer with a syringe the size of the John Hancock Building full cortisone ready to go.” —Every Single Physician in Cleveland

High praise is seal want to party with you! Seals are an authority on partying since they’re always clubbing.

Excerpt from a Painful Rehearsal of an Original Script

Dedication to your craft: doing take after take covered from the neck down with black fabric and plastic in the middle of a sun-blasted desert.

Yeesh! At least it wasn't a snakehead.

First thing I thought. The song's stuck in my head.

It's terrifying to think one of the only things that might have kept the Earth from being blasted into a crater-pocked moonscape during Able Archer 83 was whether or not Mercury was in retrograde.

Hillary must be thrilled that she will likely get the coveted endorsement of Staton Friedman.

Back in 2006, I had three very close calls with tornados in as many months. The experiences, while utterly terrifying, were even more majestic and humbling. One of those times in particular, I was driving by myself on a freeway across the plains miles from any town. There was no shelter—not even a ditch and I was more…

For anybody living on the westside of Cleveland (and possibly the eastside as well), I strongly recommend the RTA for getting to games. Most of the stations have free parking. It will put a little more time on your trip, but it will save you a fortune and lets you avoid the frustrating headache that is driving…

The "feeling of impending doom" is something seen in aneurysm cases too. I remember my mom telling me it's something ER staff look out for in people complaining of chest pain. It's sometimes a warning that they have an aneurysm as opposed to, say, congestive heart failure.

Truce! Please forgive me for being an arrogant dick. I want to apologize for making my first comment in such a douchy way. It’s actually been bugging me. So, I want to say I’m sorry. I realize I'm pretty cocky when it comes to my field, and when it comes to giving opinions, I tend to shoot my mouth off without…

One of the best sounding drum recordings ever—the chamber reverb, the parallel compression, the snow-chains: marvelous!

Whoa! I stand corrected.

It sure looks like it, but it might be possible to refine the correlation too. Nebraska, Kansas, Oklahoma, west Texas, and the Dakotas are pretty dark, but have fairly low sightings. However, those are fairly humid areas. The sightings are highest in areas that are both dark and dry. Washington state and Oregon might…

Sightings also increase where the climate is drier and will have less cloud cover. However, Washington and Oregon are fairly cloudy.