They should have handed out Tylenol at that movie.

We have something close to that, they're bacon ranch cheese fries and they're the Holy Trinity of Fry food.

Are you sure you weren't have hot butter sex?

Oh hey look! A story I'm never telling my kids!

Maryland down south, aim for Silver Spring

Pretty sure a dead woman giving birth to a live child is how 70% of horror movies work.

Stuck at home during a blizzard with your racist, homophobic, ass-backwards family members

Don't stop it, let the hate flow

Which is pedophilia

That is exactly what I meant!

UPDATE - Well, this escalated quickly. PhantomL0rd has posted a message on his Facebook page saying that police arrived at his home - called to investigate a "hostage situation" - earlier this evening.

Oh Lemonparty! If I was a cat, you would have killed me by now

Only way to get me to buy a 2DS is if they release one dressed up as a birthday cake.

No joke, my mom banned them from the house because my little sister ate hers.

Who brings a car to a bike race? Fucking asshat

Obamacare please.

Man, fuck TLC

Things that aren't meant to be heard

Child, don't remind me

This outfit, I love