You know the country has come a long way when essentially the entire south voted for Freeman.

What's the point of being a monopoly if you aren't going to self-righteously abuse your power?

Is there a better feeling than getting past the accident after a traffic jam? The highway is yours to go 90MPH, because every cop is attending to that accident.

Isn't it amazing how working in an office forces you body to change it's rhythm such that you ONLY poop while at work. I must spend an hour of my work day on the shitter meanwhile it takes me 10 weeks to go through four rolls of TP at home.

....and then Dikembe Mutombo comes out of nowhere for an emphatic cock-block.

Finger Lick, Indiana

I don't know about you guys, but I'm starting to get really sick of seeing so much flapping in basketball.

I love seeing bird magic on the court.

He was immediately whistled for a shooting fowl.

WVU hoops is looking hot this year. Look out, Big 12!

Unbelievable. That guy loves to witness.

A motivated Kobe Bryant can be a frightening thing.

When he's really excited about getting something, he doesn't take "No" for an answer.

If Hernandez were a true believer in the "Patriot Way", he would've used a musket when he killed Odin Lloyd.

"It's fine, coach. It's a rental."

KID: [Folds at line]
[Folds at line]
[Folds at line]
[Folds at line]
[Folds at line]
[Marvels at how great paper looks at this stage]
[Asks for money]
[Sets money on fire once received]
[Folds at line]
Hey, look, Mom, I—

Right. You'd have to be a football fan to have that much care for nailing corners, tight creases and precise turns.

Inflation in Hollywood is out of control. I remember a time, not too long ago, when you could pay a million dollars and get the whole baby.

Knowing that people would be dubious of her claim, Bynes was quick to point out that she had performed sensitive PCR analysis to detect latency-associated transcripts from the HSV-1 virus from extracts of trigeminal ganglia from both men.

You gotta agree with Amanda's point, though. If you're gonna get herpes, you at least want to get it from someone who's hot.