Love to write shitty Penthouse Forum letters about my sex life that also mention superfluously that I went to Harvard.

Not to defend the governor here, but Foxhoven was often described by his colleagues as “Makavelian.”

Nah, he didn’t actually resign, he’s just working remotely from Malaysia.

Needless high heels; needless make-up; slim, hourglass figure despite how she should be a power lifter of a woman; “cutesy” hairstyle; angles/poses that are just a few degrees off from a pin-up; all topped off with a size -10 waist.

What could possibly cause a completely normal fired chicken place to explode....I wonder.

Actual good looking, smart stable genius:

But the meat is a bit flavorless so add a lot of salt.

Win!

On a spit with an apple in his mouth.

Apple in mouth, Hawaiian style....

Such a namaste woman!

Marianne Williamson’s closing statement last night.

People laugh, but she was brave enough to marry a mortal even though her mother is dead set against it.

After last night, I’m feeling a Warren/Harris ticket. So guess I’ll have a kale caesar at the buffet today.

SOMEBODY CALL NEW ZEALAND

This tweet wins everything. I’m dying here.

“What’s an F5 poop tornado like?”

citation needed

Joanna Dark vs Snake smashdowns would be sweet.

You asked. We listened