For the record, it was Sam Biddle who said it looked like a Subway sandwich.

" he is showing incredible flexibility in his bones Joe"

I could happily hit a dude, but a woman? No way. This video made me seriously re-examine gender roles in American society and my patriarchal feelings towards women viz a viz normative behaviors.

Gah. And so many of them were INCREDIBLY slappable looking. A verifiable smorgasbord of hipster looking jags.

So is there any reason why US and Germany can't come out and pass the ball to each other leisurely the whole game, ending on a 0-0 draw and both teams advancing? If FIFA has a problem with that, well how about not having fuckin' ties possible in a tournament?

FUCK PORTUGAL GO USA USA USA FUCK THOSE SHITTY SEAMONKIES BACK TO THEIR PIECE OF SHIT COUNTRY

Well, fuck

Wanna know who still buys CDs? These people do, which is why "shirtless country" is a thing now. It's basically country-twanged pop rock based around dumb bumpkin escapist fantasies and performed by wholesome non-threatening rubes whose greatest dream is to become the new Jimmy Buffett. These tours are a huge deal…

As a drunk guy, I find these hilarious

Drunk dude appears to have mad-plowed disease.

"You are probably not going to see anyone as drunk as the guy featured in this report"

Wait. Hang on. Who the fuck is Luke Bryan?

Oooh, you got called the fuck out.

does anyone really care about this third world boring game?? don't get me wrong,, it's a great game for all our daughters to play growing up,,,,

You inspired me. It's hypnotic.

Once again proving that hockey skanks are the toughest skanks in all of sports.

Islamists are the extremists. The rest are called Muslims.

Islamists are scary and no fun at all when they take over. They are the Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Child Catcher of groups. Only beheading-er.

Thank you for your tireless dedication to journalism, sir.

miracle whip. And I will not apologize. Miracle whip. Lots of it. Miracle whip.