Extra points if you nicknamed your period John Wilkes Booth.

Was anyone else hoping Ilana and Abbi were going to wear their birthday restaurant formal gear (bandage dress and crop top and matching mini skirt)?

I can't fucking deal with any of this.

Please, me next. I am desperate. I will pay good money to un-learn this.

Everyone is blowing this is off as some weird fetish-y thing and missing Mark's larger point: this is becoming normal. Let me repeat that again: hardcore, extreme and often dangerous sexual acts, overwhelmingly involving women, are becoming more and more normalized. Things that should be seasoned fetishes and…

Dont' worry. I've got it covered.

so I read the first paragraph and then maybe one or two more sentences and I am already traumatized and kind of mad at you for even writing about this. Please, stop.

Leave your phone, your purse or your wallet next to the kid, in the back. Leave a bear or plush something in the passenger seat that you then sit in the car seat when you take the kid out.

By crediting Kaplan instead of the guys Madeleine was making a joke in line with the sketch. Guess your penis in your pants got in the way of you understanding it though. What a shame. We could really use more guys in comedy.

Abuse cases are really really tough.

I am trying to think of a worse thing to do to someone else but I am having trouble coming up with one. People intentionally torture and abuse the people that depend on them so that they can, in turn, get attention and sympathy. It is so sick and so bad on so many levels...to me it is way worse than just a random…

Sorry you didn't like the ride! I've worked on it, so I'd like to stick up for it for a second and say that it's actually the most technologically advanced ride in the world! It's kind of amazing from an engineering perspective. I stared in awe at some of the mechanics of it for a good 20 minutes before I could even…

Yes, by MAILING it.

It's a really great platform for publishing.

Yeah, it's easy to tell somebody to man up when you're sitting in the comfort of your home or office, hiding behind a computer. Man up my ass. Go join the army and get shot at and tell me about manning up you bunch of fuck wads.

I wanted to go back and specifically reply to you again, because I was in the wrong here and I can tell you are emotional about the topic so probably deserve to hear me say I was wrong more than some others here.

you realise the OWNER had the dog for three years, right? This family has had it for one month. It is absolutely not "scummy" for this man to want his dog back.

"Put a tiger in your tank!"

I work at a hospital and know of lots of disgusting medical stories (most of them involve explosive diarrhea that didn't take place in a restroom), but I'm going to go with one that I was actually involved in.