I don’t want to know how many Americans found this on accident by Googling “Kaepernick Lynch.”

Maybe they decided that anyone sending you to Rutgers is nothing to brag about.

Having pride in any form of college or university you went to seems like a mistake to begin with. You went to a college, great, there’s hundreds around the nation. Maybe yours was more “prestigious” than others but in the end what that means is you likely just paid more money than other people that went to community…

Slu (ts)

Wow, what a coincidenece that I use the exact same phrase! I’m going to buy a lottery ticket.

There we go. Now you can use it every morning! Unless you’re a Boxster man.

Chip hurt you? Bad? He went 10-6, 10-6, 6-9. Let’s settle down.

Because the Rams left St Louis and now it’s the LA fanbase that gets to exist in incredulous disbelief. So it’s like, you may have lost your NFL team, again, but silver lining your not rooting for the team that took Goff over Wentz.

Hey, does anyone see “Felt unusually happy about someone’s torn meniscus” on the list?

You’re additionally not allowed to run in camp. You can only ran because it’s past tents.

I used to work for a Big 4 audit firm, a GIANT organization. They happened to audit the 50/50 raffles at some local sporting events. As an employee of that firm (not even an auditor), I was forbidden from winning those raffles. Some companies are intelligent enough to make sure that there can’t even be an accusation,…

At least now his kid has a chance to get away from him

“Jerick McKinnon and Matt Asiata”

He can plug almost ...

You realise that it's possible to discipline a child without resorting to physical violence, right?

Chill dude.
This is Deadspin, not Breitbart.

Can we stop beating this dead horse?

It was too risky. The straight path to the locker room cuts directly through a day care.

I like your bold anti-child beating stance.

Diner: “Can I have the double bacon cheeseburger, fries, beer and the injured player walk-through special please.”

Waiter: “Would you like the special teams player injury or can I interest you in upgrading to a starter?”