This is such bullshit. If I wanted to see good sports-related jokes get drowned out by a bunch of fucking nonsense spewed by idiots, I'd comment on Deadspin.

Ridiculous, right? One was a high-energy power-move mat-slapper, and the other was a middle-of-the-ring technician— they barely went near the turnbuckles.

If I count a million people in a city in 2000 and two million in 2010, did I miscount one time or is "counting" not good methodology?

I'd keep him on the roster. It's rare to find a player who can go out and give you 21-21-21 every night.

DUAN might not be the best place but I'm leaving this here anyway.

The above joke was told to me by President Obama. I'm close personal friends with President Barack Obama, and he told me that joke. "Put this on Deadspin," he said to me. "You're an approved commenter, I don't want this buried down in the pending comments. This is a good joke. No, I can't post it myself, you idiot,…

WHAT THE BONK ARE YOU THINKING? WHO THE DUMP-BUMP DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? WHERE WOULD A MOTHERPLUMPING BUS COME FROM INSIDE A FATHERFROTTAGING OLYMPIC SKATING FACILITY, YOU NANA-SHRIMPING GREYED-OUT MOUTH-BREATHING—

♬ Rape meeeeeee....Rape me, my friend ♬
Mornin' gang, Father Mike here with a few announcements...

Tampa students are required to wear their long jorts.

It's amazing how childish these 'big-time donors' can be. I guess that's why they get booster seats.

What in the hell

Toboggan is the fucking worst.

Man. MAN. When you're right, you're right. I wish I'd thought of that earlier, and made that my joke.

Whoa, dude, that's sic

What I don't understand is, these two particular guys have had corroboration in hand AND the moral high ground. Why the hell would these guys cede that advantage for a little security, or worse, just give it away? Why give the other side a chance to go on the offensive? What a dumb fucking strategy. I mean, Christ, GO…

[takes a shot]

Michael: Gee, Laquetta, you sure look lovely. I feel like the luckiest guy at the dance. [Why is she wearing that bird on her head? Should I acknowledge the bird? Is she testing me?]