I’m gonna say John Hinckley Jr.

The lollipop man is called that because he used to hold a round sign on a long pole out in front of the driver. The sign resembled a lollipop. It’s the most important role on the pit crew.

So the guy perpetrates the violence and then blames the woman for not preventing it? (Checks all of human history.) YUP! CHECKS OUT!

Then explain the extra “t,” pal.

A++ tag.

Most of them have only been Cubs fans since July or so.

If you really carefully read this entire post, and read all 19 and 27 pages of the documents on Scribd, and digest all the details and the narrative completely, I find it impossible for any reasonable adult to come to any conclusion other than that that Les Miles knew...HAD TO KNOW...that his defensive coordinator was…

Found it

This is obviously nonsense. The Astros are an American League team, so they couldn’t have met in the World Series. Also, there’s no way “Dustin Hermanson” is a real name.

“It was a sloppy, messy, nasty affair.”

Her name is Melania, don’t be rude.

Using a bunch of stuffed animals left all over the place as motivation to beat someone was actually Adrian Peterson’s idea.

I’d venture in the Pats’ case, the “Trump” audible is some kind of fancy dog whistle.

NBA TV reporter? So we most likely need to be looking for a 2011 Camry, a knockoff Kate Spade bag and an iPhone 5C.

Well that display of intellectual athleticism just put him in the top 30% of his class at Arizona.

He asked the ref if it was a first down. The ref told him no. Jamesis doesn’t like taking no for an answer.

I had to change my Forge LaForge on my Ferrari LaFerrari before I could go get the papers get the papers.

A clutch pedal? Sounds like the butler’s job

Nominated for The Internet Award For The Post Most Matching The User Name.

I’ll take a 2015 Taft Patrician Royal Bourgeois Brougham, please.