One time, my kid actually asked me to put my phone away and I felt like the worst parent on Earth. So I put the phone away. And then took it out again.

That pinko oh-bamma wants us to get our healthcare from Santa now? But Phil can't even call a queer a queer?
spits tobacco
on wife
who is also sister

Some Questions About That Auburn-Alabama Game

I expected Raysism to be a little older

YOU MOVED THE HEADSTONES BUT YOU DIDN'T MOVE THE BODIES!

And here's one for the mantle

Barry, you're vastly over-simplifying the process. The Redskins don't just "get" jokes. First, they have to be free-agents. Next, you negotiate the contract. Then, you get them.

It's a real Snoop Doggy Dogg world sometimes Red Sox fans, it's a shame it seems like the Yankees have complete free rain on the free agent world. Cheer up though for all intensive purposes with the length of the contract in could be a blessing in the sky.

Oh Jesus Christ!! A Pro-Bowl all-world NFL offensive lineman wants to go out and blow off some steam and everyone starts acting like a bunch of pussies about it! Give me a fucking break!!! There was probably black music on at that bar saying Ninja this and Ninja that. Oh Paleaseeeee!! Where was Martin in that video…

Chicago O'Hare. I'll let everyone else tell stories about why, but it is by far the worst.

It's twelve o'clock in Tampa Bay
The home crowd refuses to come in
Josh Freeman is sitting next to me
Drool runnin' down his face and his chin

He says, "Son can you play me a memory
I'm not really sure how it goes
But it's sad and it's sweet
Like my passes, incomplete
I wish I could put on my own clothes"

Sing us a song you're…

Really, really excited for the 10% of Cardinals fans with internet access to find this.

I find it hard to believe that the ONE elephant that could paint would have taken this guy's spot in art school.

On the third day, the elctrical closet was empty, the door open.