I can’t look around the boys. It’s dark if I’m sitting on the toilet. If I stand to survey the damage, why sit back down? All the horrible things people seem to think happens by standing will already have come to pass.

How do you know if it’s a splashy one until you flush? And by then, it’s too late.

I’m actually 6'4", not sure why I typed 2. I’ve been one of the tallest people I know, but there are definitely taller people around. And I’m from Wisconsin, so I’m not even outside the norm for weight, I just carry it better than someone who’s 5'7" and 300.

But, to be honest, how many other people do you watch shit and wipe? I’d never heard about sitting to wipe until I got married and saw my wife do it. I bet people just assume the way they do it is how everyone else does it, and are then shocked to discover others do it differently.

My butt crack is no more crusty than anyone else’s, but poop is important...and there is a lot of time for deep thought while doing the deed that precedes this debate.

So you lean over, wipe under yourself, then pull the paper back out to look at it? I would think after wiping in that set-up, it would be far easier to just drop the wad at that point.

No worries. Poop is important.

I’m sure it is mostly paranoia, but it’s also habit. I’ve been standing to wipe since I learned to wipe as wee lad. It never even occurred to me to sit and do it, and now it’s so ingrained in my psyche that even thinking about sitting and reaching my hand back there makes me uncomfortable.

Both sitters and standers can agree, the mummy-hand is horrible.

As long as no one offers to livestream a demonstration.

I’m 6'2" and 300, so larger than average, but not so large you’d step back and say “Damn!”

The bottom curve of your cheek is below the edge of the seat. You need to reach below that curve in order to get at the actual hole. Or you lean and raise it up over the edge, as you do, but that still leaves your hand close to all the ickiness going on below you. Especially if you consider the possibility that there…

Your ass is rounded, no? The toilet seat supports the outside edge of your ass, no? Thus the downward curve of your cheek takes it below the edge of the seat.

Twisting to wipe spreads the cheeks, too. My cheeks are generally not spread when sitting on the toilet, so any “damage” from cheeks being closer together has already been done. At the least, they’re not spread enough to keep anything that’s coming out from being able to touch them.

Mongoloid? Really?

I’m not saying people are getting poop all over their hands. Obviously they’re not, or they wouldn’t keep doing it that way. But the possibility exists.

No, the shit has never reached my ass. But my hand is also not infinitely thin, it has width, and then there is the fact that I have to move my hand around to actually do any wiping, and the possibility of the pile being high enough that a nuckle might slide against it exists. Is it a high likelihood? No. But standing…

I don’t have a flat ass, it curves. The bottom edge of my ass cheeks are definitely lower than the top edge of the seat. That’s in enough for me.

Yeah, a TP issue will always come along and cover your finger with shit. But that would happen no matter how you happen to clean yourself. Why add another possibility?

It’s probably not too big a worry, to be honest, it’s just a different way of doing things, but sitting to wipe never even entered my mind as an option. The idea of even slightly reaching into the toilet seemed gross, so standing up just seemed like the obvious thing to do. It wasn’t until I got married and happened…