I'll be doing option 9. Not buying Evolve

That guy REALLY wanted to get on Twitter, Reddit and Deadspin, didn't he?

The great thing about my friends is that they would be perfectly cool with me doing whatever I wanted with my wedding. Family too. I am sorry you can't say the same for yours.

For more on how much the left shark sucks and was manufactured for the sake of virality, see the official Gawker tag here! http://gawker.com/tag/left-shark

If YOU want to have those things, then that's great, go ahead. But no couple should ever feel obligated to have anything at their wedding.

Why, because I don't fall for the wedding industry bullshit that's been perpetuated onto the public for more than 50 years?

A wedding is about the two people getting married. It's not about providing an open bar so your friends can get drunk. It's not about letting the in-laws espouse their religious beliefs on…

Nope. Your wedding is not about appeasing other people.

Gamer Gate is still a thing? I guess I have been too busy playing video games to notice what those losers are doing to save the industry.

Or you can just have the wedding you want, and if anyone else doesn't like it, then fuck them, they can stay home.

I know right? I think it's safe to say, knowing only this persons age and job, that he's a giant fucking loser who should just kill himself.

People looking to get into this series should DEFINITELY seek out the Stalker Complete mods for both games. They are incredible, and do a great job of taking some of the edge off the series.

45. One day, Deadspin will stop fucking this chicken.

I'm too well spoken to ever say that.

First AOL kills WCW, now Joystiq!? What's next, you bastards!?

Richard Sherman, one of a handful of Seahawks players busted for using PED's, is trying to talk about someone ELSE cheating? Fuck you Sherman.

You know, it IS possible to watch a football game without having to get piss drunk while doing so. Maybe the people complaining about the 9 a.m. starts should try it?

Is it too much to ask guys like Lynch and Sherman to have a shred of fucking class? I guess so. But I get it, athletes should be able to act like astronomical pricks, both on and off the field, if they can "back it up" by scoring touchdowns or picking off passes. I mean, do you REALLY need to grab your dick when…

People know all about that stuff. People don't care. Football is dangerous. And some people are assholes. Get over it. If you're going to turn your nose up at any organization that employs wife beaters or child abusers, then you're going to have to boycott pretty much everything in existence.

If Peterson doesn't fumble at the Saints 1 yard line right before halftime, Favre and the team aren't even in that situation to begin with. Harvin also fumbled in the 4th quarter and New Orleans recovered at the Vikings 7 yard line. THEN Bernard Berrian fumbled the ball deep in Saints territory later in the 4th. But…

Some of them are. This one wasn't, unfortunately.