Oh, no. You called the most important people in my life BASIC! Oh, the insult! I rue the day I gave them jewelry they like and have sentimentality towards!

hello, former Hill staffer checking in to say....this isn’t unusual.

Crack dealers for twenty, because reasons.

I’m perfectly serious.

The military actually has far more strict rules on shooting than police in America. In general, you can’t just shoot at someone if you feel threatened.

More Justine fun facts:
She referred to herself as “Juzzy Wuzzy” (her maiden name is/was Rusczyk) whenever she was talking about “woo woo” stuff.

To me that’s the most insane part. Like... the logistics of that shot are ridiculous; the cop came within inches of shooting his partner. I mean, it wasn’t even a shot through the window, it was a shot through the door.

Justine was a dear friend who was horrified about police violence and committed to making the world better in every way. She had just picked out her wedding dress last week and was so excited to show me. She was texting me trying to get me to go to “dance church” with her on sunday morning, but instead I went to a…

I dunno, I think he would just end up like his dad. His dad says that same stuff to himself all the time but he still seems like a nice guy. He seems like he holds doors for strangers and sponsors little league teams or other generic nice person things. So wouldn’t worry about it. I can see it going really well…

1. That baby is adorable.

I bet if a survey was done, most men would say that the female justices spoke MORE than their male counterparts, thus “justifying” the interruptions in the eyes of men who think a woman talking is something threatening.

Taraji just has this overwhelming sexiness that, as an anxious person, I can’t understand. I wouldn’t be able to leave my house knowing people would be looking at me all the time.

The problem with that last line is that most white women are Republicans, and the strongest indicator of how someone will vote is party identification. Super-long passage here, but worth the read:

My mom, friends, cousins, future-mother-in-law, future-sister-in-law, and just about every other woman I know didn’t vote Trump (my mom is a die-hard Republican and went for Gary Johnson, small victories I guess).

True villains see themselves as the hero of their own story.

It’s almost like politicians shouldn’t be writing legislation about medical practices they know nothing about. I mean, I don’t show up at circuses and tell lion tamers how to do their jobs, anymore than I want them stopping by my classroom with tips on pedagogy.

Do you think it’s possible to be a feminist and not devote every action of your life to feminism?

There aren’t enough hours in the day to work your way through school anymore. Tuition costs have risen enormously, and wages have not.

Best thing my birth thing ever did was to abandon me at a year old. Sure, if I hadn’t annoyed the neighbors with my crying I could have died since she never came back and locked the deadbolt behind her...

She might be funny, but she’s funny in that way when you laugh uncomfortably at an acquaintance when they make an off-color joke. In that, this wasn’t actually funny, it was weird, and weirdly nasty. Lots of Cool Girl-isms, etc in this piece.