Ooooo..... Harsh, but fair.

Florida Gator Bites Man - Not news

I’m going to be honest here. I read the title as “Florida man force-feeds bear to Florida gator”

I’m not sure if i’m disappointed, or glad that’s not the case.

Come for the bath salts, stay for the delicious faces?

The brand was unreported, but must have been PBR, Natty, or Milwaukee’s Best if the gator was actually upset about being forced to drink beer.

Gator is to Florida Man as goose is to French Man. 

Seems like a serious oversight to omit “Filed to: Florida Man”.

I don’t think “COPS” is recorded in front of a studio audience.

Hey now, let’s not kink-shame Florida Man.

Remember folks, the protagonist from this story can vote, and his vote counts just as much as yours. Do not skip the polls in 2020. 

I would suggest Walmart parking lots for you best chance to see them in full display.

Bath salts, you come for the bath salts.

Florida: come for the....? Stay for the incarceration. 

Hey Lefty! Let’s get an alligator drunk on beer!

Oh man, I’m taking a vacation in Florida in three months. There’s a chance I could see Florida Man in his natural habitat!

Given Florida, I’m surprised this is against the law.  I would have sworn this is just a normal way of life there.

Just read the wiki page. I don’t even know how to communicate to you about the mess I just read. Halfway through reading, I came to the part about an alleged assault by the husband, and thought to myself all of that **has** to be staged. But nope.

Running wild on social media?? Will the Tennessee Williamsian horror show never end??

I’m laughing so hard at “baby butthole crisis”!

I was just gonna say! How fast were they going?! Humans are squishy!