a tube filled with posters

"Oh wow, that's hilarious. Who the fuck was that Eric Lindros guy trying to impress?" -Eric Lindros

Calling Erin Andrews "gutless" only proves that TruBiotics works as advertised.

Catanzaro: [Negotiates Log Grip]
Catanzaro: [Handles Salmon Ladder]
Catanzaro: [Scales Warped Wall]
Color Guy: Catanzaro is killing it so far. KILLING it!
Play-By-Play Guy: But here's where it gets tricky.
Catanzaro: [Jumps over Slow and Low]
Catanzaro: [Dodges Hawaiian Punch]
Catanzaro: [Finishes Chicken Fingers With Deadly…

What I'd give for a hearty shove from an Australian who didn't recognize me.

Also:

Holder: I felt the grip loosen, and then I wanted to die.

I read it. Turns out they just excerpted a bit of Burneko's recipe for a grilled cheese sandwich.

That's funny. Red Klotz's Washington Generals aren't even the only generals out of Washington who have been consistently losing every thing since World War II.

Parents Night is dreadful. Last year I was singled out by a teacher in a room full of judgmental parents because my 3rd grader, for the "art show", drew a picture of a chicken giving a horse a hand-job. Seriously. I have the photo prove it if you provide me with an e-mail to send it. When I got home, I feared…

Giancarlo Stanton Nearly Hit One Out of the Stadium

Hernandez 6/17/13 (11:35:01 P.M.): I think I messed up bad, coach. What do I say when the media starts asking the tough questions?

"...bilked customers out of tens of millions of dollars."

Whoa, I thought he settled when his team drafted Weeden.

Hey, since we're on the topic of Northeast Ohio, let me ask you about something I've always wondered. In Northeast Ohio, do they just straight-up give stuff away all the time?

Not to be outdone, Pablo Sandoval had three grand slams after the game.

This is almost as bad as Bison Dele's boat boner.

Oh, come on. There are far easier ways to get a Man-shaf—

Get a grip, that's quite a stretch.