Yeah, dude, fuck this chalk bracket. Where's my Heroin Cinderella?

How about I just call you a damned fool once more, and not care about the logical merits of my argument? Because all that matters is that you're a damned fool. A persistent one, at that.

Yes. Yes it is less of a problem. You damned fool.

Your food can be treated with ammonia to destroy the massive amounts of fecal bacteria present, but god forbid the person preparing it not be wearing latex or nitrile gloves...

You're a damned fool.

A backwards "K" denotes a strikeout looking.

It would be irresponsible for a science show to give any credence to something that is thoroughly debunked by clear and abundant scientific evidence.

I'd like to say I'm surprised that, in 2014, racism is still so prevalent, but I currently live in Alabama and I pretty much hear a white person say "nigger" every single day.

More often than not, it's the tourists being rude and inconsiderate. We're just trying to get on with our lives most of the time.

Soundtrack of a woman having sex

That's why it's called the Nod 'n' Scratch.

Wow, you don't know anyone whose life was ruined by cocaine?

True. In my days of using I was fortunate enough to have an insanely wealthy girlfriend, and a really good dope delivery guy.

I knew as soon as I saw the headline that this was going to be about Black Sails. There were three dongs in last week's episode, alone!

I wish that I wasn't so completely certain that these (illegal) rape and murder threats are not being fully investigated, by either law enforcement or Duke University, simply due to the fact that, as a sex worker, Ms. Knox's existence is deemed less worthy.

Not a news story, but I refuse to do Facebook. Never have, never will, and don't understand the obsession. But I feel like a better person for it, and my smug sense of superiority thanks me.

Anyone voting for coke over heroin has never done heroin. The only advantage coke has over dope is that it's harder to overdose. Heroin makes you happy and not awful to be around, and is physically and mentally less detrimental than coke.

She was. One of many, but still.

These stats are skewed and can't be relied upon because Square is primarily a small-business tool, used in places where tipping would be out of the norm. I couldn't tell you a single sit-down establishment that used Square, and I've been working in restaurants for many, many years. Definitely not a representative…

We can go deeper into Miley's butt? Well, I, for one, am up to the challenge.