No, I think you're right. I'm thinking this though:

she just scored in the 5 hole

Well, that's enough Internet this year...

Cooking with a Ferrari is easier, you just hold the turkey over the car.

yup.

Am I the only one whose favourite character in the Sound of Music was the baroness? Maria was such a weed. The Baroness was so much more cool. And those CLOTHES!

A couple of years ago the Times ran an article about the "evolution" of the bulldog.

i place my money on Sorority hijinx, where 'hijinks' = emotional torture

Hey, that's nothing. Eastern Wisconsin also mispronounces "professional basketball team" as "Milwaukee Bucks."

by-planes?? Seriously??

Nice piece. Should be "biplanes" instead of "by-planes." (3rd graph, 2nd sentence.)

They flew biplanes - "bi" as in two winged. They traveled by biplanes, not "by-planes." Sorry - its just like poking a stick in my eye. That is all.

If you got into a huge fight over that I wonder what will happen when you introduce her to heliocentrism.

If you're eating something and it winds up in your lungs, I'm fairly certain you're doing something wrong.

Ground Control to Major Tom (ato)...

Looks familiar: