That's not a scar it's as line that appears during pregnancy then goes away

+2 minutes for poke-checking

Fuuuuuck I knew someone would beat me to the Brass Bonanza punch!!!!

That gif is mesmerizing... The 2 guys in suspenders? classic

That's what she gets for quoting an Amanda Bynes tweet when answering a pageant question

i can't believe that no one has mentioned that besides Chris Bosh, there isnt a big man in the league who plays further away from the basket than KG

Lord Willin was super duper dope... I miss the Clipse + Pharrell combo

Insert boobs joke here

-1

YOU PLAY TO WIN THE GAME

I came here to make this EXACT JOKE... Well played +1

Just the water, not the actual bottle... Shoulda specified

No need... Her dad is a massive hockey fan so that's already been taken care of. Her sister too

True story: I watched the entire game, and during the 3rd OT my 11 month old started crying like crazy. I knew my girl would need a bottle for him so figured I'd be a swell guy & get it for her. It was premade, so all I had to do was put it in the microwave, 60 seconds was all I needed...

The response was even better when I told her upon delivering the bottle... "just rewind it"... yea, because that's totally the same as watching it happen live after 5 hours invested. She's a sweetheart though, And I suppose it's all part of being a dad

Worst possible ending to my night... I watched the WHOLE game. During the 3rd OT my 11 month old started crying (furiously). I knew my wife would need a bottle to give him. I got up, it took me about 60 seconds to make the bottle... Well, I think you know how this story ends. I was devastated

1am... I'm assuming by this point pizza & beer has turned to coffee and... coffee

That house is worth nearly 2.5 million dollars?!?!?

"After all you're just asking, and wasn't I just saying that I'm committed to discourse and critical thinking? Yes. I am. But here's the thing: you're not."