I hope Jonas uses that as his grindr pic

But you don't understand! They LOVE me!

The balls on this kid.

It's not that high. More of a pony.

Think of this as a Larry Kroger dating lesson.

" Start going to church or another place where bloody Bronze Age fairy tales and magical wine are served up in equal measure. "

Call an American Embassy?

This is a fantastic story! I love how it was told in tweets.

You know they'd stock a crowbar in the Cornucopia for him.

Since I can infer from your duck comment that you think I am, in fact, a cunt, I have this to say:

I'm actually incredibly heartbroken right now. I grew up in Waco and left for New York at 18. My mom still lives there. My best friends live all over Texas. Women. Men who have women they love. Women and men I've known from childhood.

Hello class, and welcome to Introduction to Feminist Poetry. I am your teacher, Professor Stephbanana. I would like to open this class with a breakdown of the poem "Your Super-Feminine Pantyhose", by John. Let's begin.

For once, TSG lives up to its name.

My brother Yuri, he get you anything your like.

My absolute favorite is Jaime as Sonny Crockett (portrayed by Don Johnson) in Miami Vice. Besides the fact that it combines two of my favorite shows (yes, I'm weird), it's sort of a fun reminder that Don Johnson is essentially just the 80s version of the Sawyer from Lost or Jaime from Got.

Hodor

Surely they'd be crows.