This is shoddy reporting, Anna. It seems like you never even looked into whether she was getting laid with the frequency or effectiveness required to properly criticize art.

There are only 2 things that I would tell my younger self-

You know, a lot of times I default into "ugh, teenagers," and "I'm so glad that Instagram/Facebook didn't exist when I was in high school." But then I remember that some teenagers(/PEOPLE) are awesome and I love that we got to see this.

Would anyone be interested in my similarly-themed DIY article, "Everything I Fucked Up While Trying To Act Like Anthony Bourdain For Most of My Twenties"?

Who the hell goes out for the night with a bag big enough to hold this kit? If I'm out and in the general mood for a one-night stand, I am not carrying my giant daytime purse. I am maybe carrying a wristlet, and more likely carrying nothing because I've stuck my ID, cash, and a credit card in my bra.

It's totally the "Stride of Pride". Or it should be. :-)

I am ready to throw down over "#LiesToldByFemales I made it from scratch." There is a tart shell baking in the own right now that says otherwise, asshole. If I buy something, I say so. #bakingpride

Fact: Children never carry germs or make hideous noises at night.

My pastor told us the day we met him, "Your ceremony is up to you, but if you want me to ask who gives the bride away, you're going to have to find another church. Women aren't property."

Word. I grew up in a healthy house so whenever anyone asked if I wanted to spend the night, I said "Sure. What kind of cereal do you have?"