I guess we'll never know what does the Fox say.

Meanwhile, Urban tweets out multiple pictures of UF players blocking each other.

This dude just won $0 wearing sideburns like an asshole.

I personally predict an increase in office productivity; a barrage of soccer on TV will make the average American's job seem exciting and worthwhile by comparison ...

yeah that's because Pujols had a better year

How many Atlanta writers voted for Ruben Amaro, Jr.?

Perhaps we should take a Pol?

POT ISN'T LIFE OR DEATH...

He smoked some weed, somehow got vilified for it, was thrown off his football team, went to rehab for weed, and now plays for the Arizona Cardinals.

Here's Austin's day, in six seconds

Jean Teasdale? The Jean Teasdale? I've read your books! I've read all your books!

I used to stare at the track list and running times on every album I saw at the store, and if the band in question had a crazy long song, I was riveted. "9:44?! That band must mean business!"

President Obama, in fact, was going to offer his support to Peterson but subsequent reporting convinced him to change his mind. He, more than anyone, knows it's best to avoid addressing rampant birthers.

If you experience red skins after having unprotected sex with Adrian Peterson, you should consult your physician immediately.

No surprise how Todd turned out

Hey look, it's the dumbest sports column you'll read all week.

Both of these issues could be remedied by the use of Sheepskins.

october 10 will just never be a fun day for me. i hate this day. real fans of magic johnson on nba countdown and that time he put in his resignation because bill simmons took over the show after wilbon left will know what i mean

Craig James: Hey, Bieber fans, wanna buy a one-year subscription to Sports Illustrated? [pauses, smiles nervously] Seriously though, if I don't sell six of these before the end of the day they're coming to take my house.

Also, nobody is offended.