Oh man, words cannot describe my dissapointment upon seeing "Scarlett Johansson doing kind of Lucille Bluth" and it was not her mistaking the "drowsy-eye" alcohol warning for a "winking-eye" alcohol suggestion.

Sorry, The Rock, but I already learned about eating eggs from Gaston, 'cause he's ♪ roughly the size of a baaaaaarrrrrge. ♪

Jeezus, Chrissy. Asking for directions offends you? My god, sounds tiring.

I advise everyone to acquire “a Fucking friend"

Oh, ftrange!

This is going to be the new normal for America. The only way you will be able to afford higher education is to be rich or suck a rich dudes dick. You won't be able to afford health care unless you are especially tragic and you can crowd-source on reddit.

Medievalist here. This is SUCH a 17th century book. Before the 17th century, women weren't allowed to be on top and the switch up only began happening in the 17th century (probably in the 16th century, too). I believe it had something to do with their belief about how women become pregnant (but I can't remember all…

I read everything with a lisp.

dat 'stache.

Am I the only one that read that pronoucing the "s"s as "f"s in my head?

Tis pity that such device does not run on the powerful light of the sun, although ye olde sundial contains much too heavy a weight for to drag it closer towards my bedchamber as to be "hands free."

Up betimes and to Cheapside, where I did saw my Lady Ann Summer, and she most willing, did provide me a most handsome set of Dildoe. it cost me dear, being well-crafted and worth 3 guineas. And so home and to bed (if ye can divine my meaning).

So I guess her husband isn't all that great in the meat department after all, heh heh. Oh, I'm just wicked, WICKED!

I'm going to try and work in "... a white hogs pudding ...."

Well, he looks like one.

" . . . the thing with which a man piffith. "

I went to the shoppe called Ye Olde Babeland and did there purchase a fine-looking wooden dildo but was dissatisfied. Perchance I will visit Goode Vibrations on the morrow to find another that does not splinter. *woodcut of a woman giving side eye*

Tis gettyng hawte uppe inne heeyaugh!

Why is it people always get so upset about Affirmative Action but not about legacies? For some reason we're ok with the historically advantaged having a leg-up over the rest of us, but not the historically disenfranchised.