I think the bigger question here is who in the hell is still writing to Dear Abby for advice?

Oh hey, by the way, it says "this is a big one." Didja get that? :)

It says "this is a big one!"

I think it says, "this is a big one!"

Looks like "this is a big one!"

"This is a big one," but "a big one" is all crammed together so it looks like one word.

It says "this is a big one."

"this is a big one"

I'm not buying this one. The bad vegan who believes in a bunch of woo woo nonsense and the person who loves Red Lobster and Kirk Cameron are not the same person.

I'm calling fake.

There's no way that this guy, if real, wouldn't wear his leather pants to the funeral. No way at all.

Also: Wouldn't it be even stranger if he had "one-too-many posters" of Michael Phelps *not* in a Speedo?

I dated a guy who legitimately liked Two and a Half Men. :-/

And big sister Amaranth, who is off finding herself in Milan.

I tried Girl Scouts as a kid. Too much sewing and cooking, not enough camping for me. My dad was a boy scout troop leader, realized when I was about 7 that I was getting absolutely nothing out of it, other than a great recipe for a pineapple upside down cake. He adopted me into his boy scout troop as their "mascot"…

It's taking stock of its surroundings before making its next move. The good news: It can only move very slowly and has abysmal night vision.

We've all seen cellphones rotate as they vibrate. It's cool, but I would hope that a museum curator would take a slightly more scientific approach to this problem.

Quinoa really does fill the void left by the decline of Suri's Burn Book.

"What's North of North? Nothing."

I think Paula Deen is in need of a Diversity Day.

Polenta is gonna be sooooo jealous that this got front-paged.

Am I the only person who wants Paula Deen to be interviewed by Al Roker or Tamrin Hall instead of lily-white Matt Lauer? (Full disclosure: I'm so white I'm almost transparent.)