You can't drop an Asterix next to his skills because Asterix is busy smacking Romans around.

Dark Souls, I love you and I've spent about 90 hours so far playing you, but the PVP is kinda dumb.

I think you're missing the point. The point is to put you in ridiculous playable situations. The story is just a framework that gives you some reason why you're dodging rocks in a snowy valley, and a police helicopter is shooting at you.

Chocobo fthaghn!

Ah, the old "only completely unbiased people should review games" argument. Okay, here we go again.

So you're basically saying that it'd be BAD for reviewers to ditch the "anything less than 70 is crap" scale and use the whole range?

MOSTLY SPOILERLESS ABOUT DARK SOULS:

Having played the game, I can safely say that nope, that won't be the case at all. The inventory doesn't mean much at all in this game. It's all about power loadouts, weapon skills and armor.

The lack of a properly accurate control method for games that aren't turn-based is what's keeping phone platforms from really taking off.

If you're like me, you go human and wind up summoning two insanely overpowered people who basically take out the boss in a minute flat. Seriously, though, it's one of the fights where it's the most essential to have extra people with you. Get some humanity from being summoned into the previous boss fight and helping…

Yep, pretty much what I was gonna say, but better put.

"The chocolate around the carmel isn't exactly Hershey chocolate..."

I've avoided summon signs normally except before bosses, for that very reason. Anor Londo was an exception because I was stuck (and then I got invaded, prompting me to pounce on another summon sign).

Dang. I won Internets and I completely missed it. Woo!

I was all like yeah, okay, but then I noticed that you can draw dicks and send to your friends to annoy them.

SPOILERLESS: I was kinda lucky the first go around Anor Londo. I spotted two summon signs, and it turns out they were both overpowered as hell for the area, pretty much tearing through EVERYTHING in a couple of seconds. Even the boss took just a minute or two, and I barely got the chance to get in a hit on'em. Rah. So…

This one's to all you haters replying to this guy: It IS possible to love a movie that's technically bad and has a ton of storytelling flaws. "It has problems" =/= "Everybody hates it".

Well, there are a few ways. The most obvious one to most is that the resale value drops. Not a problem to people like me... I don't sell my games.

Man, that theme sounds like it belongs in Advance Wars. This is a good thing.

SPOILERLESS ABOUT DARK SOULS: Played Dark Souls for something like 7 hours yesterday. Maybe more, not sure. Rung the second bell. Followed this up by spending a buncha time setting up a proper FAQ for the preceding boss on the Dark Souls Wikidot page.