Why the fuck does it need chapters when it’s a four hour movie?

Yeah. I don’t get why Dan is going on about how a cousin is a safer choice of (sexting) affair partner than other women would be. Having an affair with a cousin is problematic for several non-incest related reasons:

All The King’s Horses = Lois Lane is a centaur now & forever, no take-backs.

Why the fuck does it need chapters when it’s a four hour movie? Endgame was three and didn’t bother dropping title cards between acts.

I’m getting really tired of people for finding reasons to blame the wife for her husband WANTING TO FUCK HIS COUSIN.

While there are some (fairly unpopular, outside of academic circles) branches of moral philosophy that might give you the all clear on this, I’d still say the answer is yes in this case, for a number of reasons.

First, almost no one who has an “affair” ever thinks they’re going to get caught, but statistically, a whole…

“Don’t count on it Batman” is what Diana says when Bruce asks if she wants to see what he’s got in his utility belt.

Will I watch it. Yeah.

For sure, other than the lying I think that’s the worst part about cheating, if you do it with someone that your partner has to see often. It can really exacerbate the betrayal when not only you are lying for years, but your lover is as well. Like all the picnics and family reunions etc. where his wife and his cousin…

“Is the fact that lies/omissions/obfuscations will inevitably be required over the years, at least occasionally, itself a reason to condemn such an affair?”

I’d say yes to this, too, but perhaps to a lesser extent. Best practices in a situation like this is to put your cards on the table. If you need a no-contact, low…

Finding out someone has been lying to you obviously can rock a relationship, but also going forward... she has to see this person again. At least if he’d been doing this with, like, an ex-coworker it would be someone the wife would never have to interact with, but this person is part of the family. Now they all have…

Yeah, this is kind of where I sit. I can’t really judge something that isn’t hurting other people and happens among consenting adults (especially since, if you go back far enough in my family tree, there were a couple cousin-marriages among a very insular ethnic group from which I’m descended, though luckily I’m far…

Oh yeah, the *wife* is the problem here.

But, like, it’s not just that it’s his cousin... it’s that he’s married and sexting another woman.

Or to not do it at all.

“She’ll be happier if I just do it and don’t tell her” is pretty shaky logic used by every asshole to justify their affairs. At the extreme, it could apply to the BTK killer. Best case scenario, she dies happy and never finding out you were comfortable lying to her for decades, but even that…

I was reading it in Dear Prudence and thought “if this were Dan Savage’s column, he’d probably respond with ‘actually, this is good BECAUSE they’re cousins’ or something.”

She mentions the flirting happening when the kids were small. Maybe they then contained themselves for the next 15 years until there was less risk, but that doesn’t seem like the most likely scenario.

Like I said, I don’t really care about the incest-adjacent behavior, but the guy clearly knew his wife might react…

I mean, the bigger issue is, you know, the whole “being married” thing.

I’m fine putting cousin fucking in the “not for me, but two consenting adults, so who gives a shit” barrel along with furries and sounders, but this guy’s been lying about it for three decades, and there is something at least troubling about keeping something this potentially family-ruining a secret for that long and…

Look, I try to be open-minded and sex-positive and whatever the fuck, but then I read an advice column where a person’s husband is sexting their own cousin and the response is that they should look up the legal definition of cousin-fucking and twist themselves into knots to arrive at a place where you can sext your…