Thank you so fucking much for this. For real.

I'm just gonna leave this right here...

Already done.

That is hilariously worded but I whole-heartedly agree. Every fibre of my being is telling me that this person is not actually a woman. And if she is I feel very, very sorry for her.

Umm...I don't think people are sitting around for '3-5 months' greedily rubbing their hands together and going "oooh, I can't WAIT to abort this foetus!".

Second last.

Brilliant.

I LOVE Mighty B! I didn't know she was behind that!

Here's the link if the pic doesn't show up - [thehighheeltimes.files.wordpress.com]

I don't have a personal pic but heres one I found on google. Pretty much the exact replica of the shoes and how they look on; down to the ankle strap, peep-toe, even the height seems about the same. I see no difference except that mine were made of suede (and hers probably cost 10x more).

Your legs and feet just naturally settle into them. You don't feel like it's a balancing act the entire time. You just...walk. They felt very sturdy and I walked pretty much like I would in any other pair of 5 inch heels. They didn't exactly feel like wedges or platforms, in a weird way they felt like I was standing…

Pretty much.

I bought a pair of Heel-less shoes the other day (So hot and so cheap! I would never have expected to find them at a run-of-the-mill mall boutique for $35) and they're ~uber~ comfy. I'm on this site so much though, that the first time I wore them to work, I kept imagining a long-ass comment thread on Jezzie about how…

Ok, am I the only one NOT seeing the makeup as "wrinkles" at all? I totally thought she was supposed to look like some sort of regal cat (what with the blue gem like colour on her forehead). Seriously, what I see is gray fur, with like, fuzzy white brows and whiskers. If it was meant to be wrinkles why would her skin…

I am (was?) sleeping with a dude who feels the need to say "I need to eat meat because it's good for my boner. You know that right?? YOU KNOW THAT MEN NEED TO EAT MEAT BECAUSE THE PROTEINS GO TO THEIR PENIS, RIGHT?!" everytime he picks up a knife and fork to cut into a piece of meat.

Cool story, bro!

O.O Holy. Shit.

I LOL'd at the "If someone tries to throw you a second baby shower, politely decline" comment. But yeah, no, I had no idea this was a thing and still am not convinced as to why it makes sense. I get the "you can reuse bigger ticket items for baby number two" but if someone is throwing me this party and people are…

If I understood anything about Gifs, I'd place that one with that dude that kinda looks like that guy from Sean of the Dead (not sure if it's him), clapping really passionately in his seat RIGHT. HERE.

LOL I was about to ask you what "whole" milk was until I saw the comments. Maybe it's a Canadian thing or an "I really don't drink enough milk and therefore don't talk to people about it" thing, but I've never heard it referred to as Whole milk. I'm learning so much as well haha