Thanks for the suggestion! I'm skimming Figleaves now!

I have a couple tankinis from Lane Bryant, but I live in Texas and we go swimming A LOT so variety is awesome for me. I do love their tankinis, though. I wasn't real fond of their bikini tops though.

Oh my God I had found SimplyBe and liked the white top and somehow missed all the cute bottoms. You are awesome!

So I was thinking of joining the plus size bikini club this summer. Any ideas on where I can get a reasonably cute pattern (I like bright colors and big patterns OR retro style in white) in a 40DD for less than $100? Everything I've found has been ridiculously expensive or maxes out somewhere in the neighborhood of…

Thank you. GOD I hate that if I bring this up again he'll freak out but it's awkward as balls with this all hanging over the proceedings.

Thanks. He did finally turn up. I don't want to bring it up but I think the biggest issue was the "revelation" that he apparently thinks I chose my current fiance over him but he never really wanted to be in the boyfriend running. It's...tricky and I hate it.

That's so terrible. Unfortunately, Houston has a lot of road rage and our murder rates in certain parts of town are off the chart. I'm so sorry f or your friend. :(

I'm feeling a little bummed right now. I think one of my best friends is avoiding me because of some ill-advised drunken honesty on both our parts. I need a hug.

I'll join y'all on the Efron couch. Here, have a picture I've been storing in my photobucket because REASONS.

Alright, I've been inspired. I've always wanted a bikini but haven't had the guts since I was 12 and some men in their 20s kept hitting on me (in their defense, I was 5'9). I'd buy one this year but I already bought a swimsuit. My fiance has offered to buy me one, though.

I've "gotten" every man I ever dated by being the aggressive one. I'm actually marrying a guy who I planned to seduce at a cartoon convention. One of my best friends/ex-boyfriends and I were discussing this the other day. Apparently I'm just the kind of girl who comes off like someone you should let make the first…

50 Shades of Gosling?

I went for the "get a job doing slightly manual labor in a large store" method.

If he was the cycling police in Toronto I would go there just to break every single cycling law in the hopes of getting him to handcuff me. Until then, I'll just write fan fiction about it.

Actually, I would say your worst case scenario is that the entire rest of your family agrees with the crazy relative (I'm the only "out" liberal on either side of my family and also, as far as I know, the only one who believes in abortion rights) and stops talking to you.

Natasha Bedingfield is dressed like a drag queen ice dancer. A drag queen ice dancer who is about to get read for filth by her drag mother for those shoulder pads. Holy hell.

If I ever fulfill my lifelong dream of becoming a drag queen (unlikely due to my vagina) I am going to totally use Tits McGee as my drag name.

YES! THIS IS DEFINITELY TRUE LOVE! WE SHOULD RUN AWAY AND HAVE A WEDDING FULL OF SLOTHS! IT WILL BE THE BEST WEDDING ANY OF THE SLOTHS HAVE EVER ATTENDED! BUT BEFORE THE ELOPEMENT I MUST SLEEEP. GOOD NIGHT AND THANK YOU FOR VIDEO! ALSO SLOTHS!

YOU ARE DEFINITELY THE COOLEST LADY I HAVE EVER MET AND OH MY GOD YOU'RE LEFT HANDED? I AM ALSO LEFT HANDED!!! LEFT HANDED PEOPLE ARE THE COOLEST. WE'RE SO SPECIAL WE NEED SPECIAL SCISSORS FOR SPECIAL PEOPLE! HELL YES! THANK YOU FOR THE VIDEO BECAUSE IT ROCCCCCCCKKKKSSSSSSS!!

Theoretically I guess, but that sort of defeats the purpose of reusing it, you know? Plus if I don't use it for this then what am I going to do with it?