My mom ended up being that mom for my friends...I would get a little envious though, because I was always way too scared to tell her any of my secrets when I growing up! I remember one of my friends telling my mom when she had her first kiss (we were around 15, late bloomers), and I was like, wait...WHAT? Is that how…

Those poor friends' parents. "But Malia and Sasha's house has a bowling alley!"

I can totally see President Obama being that embarrassing eager Dad, but they will love that about him as they get older. Michelle Obama I imagine being one of those Mom's that everyone goes to when shit hits the fan. "Ms. O, can I talk to you? One of our friends is sleeping with a 20 year old, we're worried for…

Sasha and Malia, I love you girls but you don't even know what an embarrassing dad is! Your dad asks your friends about their homework? My dad made any boy that came over listen to him play the accordion before they could watch a movie in the basement with me, and my dad got REALLY into playing the accordion.

Let's discuss.

I laughed so hard at every joke in this piece people think I have Robin Williams in my office doing stand-up from 1986. OMG. OMG Lindy.

Everything very spot on except...was she just a Portuguese migrant worker for the summer? In Southern Europe, that kind of migration is kinda common, especially to richer, more northern countries during high season.....I always thought she returned home to Portugal and he followed there.

I just want to talk about Karl aka Rodrigo. Why even bother with the rest of this ?

My darling Lindy,

Your last paragraph captures a sentiment I've been struggling to articulate for awhile. Thank you.

For the clueless people:

What. the fuck. Martin Freeman. Seriously? SERIOUSLY?

I've been a fan of his for sometime and completely missed the fact that he's an actual piece of shit. Amazing what they can do with make-up & spec FX these days.

Clearly piracy is ruining the music business.

This is as much for the "genius-level IQ" line as everything else.

Pretty sure lots of really poor people are still really good parents and don't encourage marijuana use in their toddlers. Ditto teen parents, even those without means.

I understand that the list of books I take out at the library and my debit card transactions aren't exactly private either, but I'd still take a very dim view of that information being disseminated to the public by the courts.

I think the fact that she started out by ordering native craftspeople to produce what she wanted and selling them at a profit was.... maybe an early indicator that she wasn't going to be the worlds greatest employer. :/