“I do school every weekday :)“

You will never, ever be able to remove the history of all the disgusting porn you watch, you dirty, dirty pervert. The woman is going to discover your filth and never speak to you again. You will never make friends and you will die cold and alone. Your cat will have eaten most of the flesh from your face before your…

Fifteen is PLENTY old to go on a long foreign trip with parental chaperons, even if they ARE doofuses. (And what’s wrong with no itinerary? I’ve never traveled anywhere with one.) Just be straight with her : “look, I think you’re smart and wonderful, but your dad and stepmom are occasionally idiots, so I’m nervous…

I have that issue occasionally with some of my friends/acquaintances here: super nice and pretty fun and certainly not dumb, but you either feel like an asshole showoff if you run at your natural setting, or awkward and weird if you try to ramp it down. I generally just run at my usual “oh christ what is she on about…

Yeah I mean, I’m a student at a pretty prestigious school so I’m surrounded by moderately smart people a lot of the time, but I’m a bit older than all the other undergrads and haven’t made any super close friendships. And while my peers are closer to being on my level than people I generally interact with in the…

I don’t think Marilyn Manson’s hurting for fornication partners.

Heck, never mind the food - you are definitely allowed to prefer the child who doesn’t hit.

I used to work in a day-care and got a lot of baby-sitting gigs this way. You wouldn’t believe how many times parents told me something like, “He won’t anything but Happy Meals!” Um yeah, because at three, he’s really able to drive his little yellow-roofed red car down to the drive-through and order those all by…

This is wonderful.

You, sir or miss, have just made my day. Srsly.

Well, what did you tell her? You can’t just start a primo story like that and leave us hanging... *grin*

Yes, but that's the headache to which I'm referring. I'm not saying it can't be done. Obviously there are loads of delightful children who eat a wide variety of food and are grateful for it and have manners and etc. But they don't pop out of your body that way. You must spend years cultivating the child. That is a…

I agree with cinnamon toast kid. Cinnamon toast is regular bread that’s toasted, buttered, and sprinkled with cinnamon and sugar. That’s a picture of toasted cinnamon-raisin bread. It’s not the same! f I asked for cinnamon toast and someone gave me toasted cinnamon-raisin bread, I’d be disappointed.

Raisin bread (the cinnamon toast entry) is an abomination.

does this guy ever go out and have fun?

I don’t know how you can just block 3 specific hours of “family time” at the same time, every day. I don’t have kids and I don’t know if this guy does, but you can’t just refuse to spend any time with kids or a spouse until 7 PM.

Chapter one: “Crunches and Spreadsheets Won’t Save Me From The Unstoppable Roll of Time, It Turns Out, So Lets All Chill.”

No, not really. You have to prove that she knew there was nothing in the drink and deliberately lied about it. If she thought it was drugged it doesn’t matter whether or not it was true. “I felt odd so I assumed I was drugged” is a totally legit legal defense. That is the way libel and defamation works in the US. It’s…

When I announced to my mother that my boyfriend and I were had found an apartment and were moving in together, she asked, “But did his mom say it was okay?” as if I’d asked permission for a play date.

My little sister came home one day sobbing and said “my friend hung himself.” My mom patted her on the shoulder and said, “hanged.”