Witnessed At Convention Many Years Ago:

Thank you for the story - and the new music on my rotation!

I didn’t know Keb Mo, but after hearing the link by BlueJeans...what a nice way to be taken to work...and with hot coffee and a nana no less. You earned your relationship karma.

Oh my goodness, I was at a conference this week where someone (I mean, a million someones, but one person in particular) started doing that self-aggrandizing rambling-instead-of-a-question thing. The speaker finally was like, “Oh man, I have such a great answer! I can’t wait until you finish your question so I can say…

Ex-Boyfriend needed to spend some time in my house/car. My kids learned when they were still in single digits that the rule is, “Driver picks the music, passengers STFU about it.” To be fair, this bites me in the ass sometimes, too, because my husband’s taste in music is often indifferent while I’m highly opinionated…

If you picked me up and did all that AND Keb Mo was playing I’d kiss you on the cheek and say “Best girlfriend ever”

When I was in 4th grade, I was already nearly 5’10”. Which is my current height. I was basically a year from finishing puberty. They thought I had a pituitary tumor and might die. Turns out I just have a huge pituitary and some hormone disorders. Point is, shit was hard for youngrootof. Kids were fucking dickbags.

I’m a lawyer, and at the time of this incident was practicing in several fairly small and rural Southern counties. I’d been out of law school for 2 or 3 years, long enough to be tired of the crap I would fairly regularly get from some older male lawyers. I had a trial in the neighboring county, and my opposing counsel…

Are you sure back seat dude, didn't make a sizzle noise? That woulda added to the burn

I loves me some Keb Mo’!

Mom burns are the best burns:

You shoulda put on this song as you dropped him off and said goodbye with a pointed glare.

You didn’t “burn” the cop by any stretch of the imagination, and you didn’t use it “perfectly” in context. He wasn’t making some insult to which you gave a witty comeback, you were just a drunk asshole he was stopping from killing anyone else.

I was with some friends in a bar and this douche started hitting on my friend and being a real dick about it. She was trying to be polite about it, but I didn’t feel any such obligation. So I whispered something in her ear about him and she laughed. He saw it and replied, “If you’re mad that I’m talking to your friend…

My 16-year-old sister looks a little bit older so she occasionally gets hit on by boys in their early 20s. At one point, this one sorry fellow tried to convince her that “age is just a number,” to which she quickly retorted, “a prison cell is just a room.”

Jeepers. I would definitely wait in line for that.

Waiting at the airport for a flight. There’s a line of about 10 people at the counter that were delayed from an earlier flight. Some dude pushes past the line and screams at the desk agent that, “(He) has to be on this flight! And it has to be first class!” Agent tells him that she can help him but he need to wait in…

Many years ago, as I stood in line at the (University) gym to be issued gym clothes, a student in front of me told the attendant he needed a “medium jock strap with a large cup.” The attendant immediately came back with “Why? Are you trying to leave room for your hand?”

No, it’s Becky.

OMG