The 20th century called. They want their values back.

I’m a male who prefers married women, and I often wonder whether they tell or not. Some of them were mad at hubby (or wifey, in one instance), others missed the freedom of flirting and then some, and some were women who had been with me when they were single and wanted a stroll down memory lane. I wish I had the data…

Now you know why I refer to Bobby Jindal as Huey Short.

I’m still pissed that OJ made us draft Al Cowlings, his best friend from Southern Cal, as a condition of signing with the Bills and not holding out and shit. And then AC was like a fuckin’ HORRIBLE football player. Do you know what’s worse than an atrocious defensive lineman? An atrocious defensive lineman who gets…

When you’re next to fucking KRUK and you look that bad, it’s time to check yourself into Hell’s rehab. That shit is fucking KRUK, for fuck’s sake.

He was trying to fuck up the prop bet, “Who will the MVP thank first?” He wound up not being MVP, but he sure tried to kill it for Leitch, the one person who had an 80,000 to 1 bet that Bud would be extended the primary gratitude.

The most graphic part was her little tongue thing at :31. That ALWAYS means they’ll let you fuck them.

“Keep Pounding!”

It is imperative to achieve consent on nutworthy female body parts, if any (see Bryant, Kobe). It is difficult to imagine that anyone would volunteer their eyes for that task.

What if you take your driverless car to a pub, get wasted, and then have the car drive you home? Are you “operating” the vehicle?

As a native of an AFL city, I can tell you that we are ALL proud of Joe Namath, even those of us who are loathe to root for the Jets under most any circumstances. We still remember the “Foolish Club” label. We recall that Minnesota promised they’d be a charter AFL team, only to change their minds overnight and emerge…

Well, yeah...I should hope a pederast who shows his balls to children would get criticized!

I never thought I’d say this, but I finally found a team worse than our intramural squad in grad school. And we won the league.

I moved because I hated where I was from. And now I sometimes have flashbacks to how much I hated where I was from, especially when I’m about to go back (holiday, major life event, etc.)

I bought too many Cree LED bulbs and now they’re going to outlive me. The light bulbs actually remind me of my wretched, grotesque, inevitable mortality. :-(

I bought too many Cree LED bulbs and now they’re going to outlive me. The light bulbs actually remind me of my…

I was always the cannon because I’m an LSU fan and that is the name of their only Heisman Trophy winner. I’m not an especially cool or fun person.

Bob Vila has never built anything and cannot build anything. He just talks about building things.

DREW HAS GOT A BONER WHAT DID HIS DADDY DOOOOOOOOOO?!

“Shiite!”

And yet, his hair is arguably less absurd than that of Mark Davis, a man who should be wearing a helicopter beanie.