It's Funny Because Kent Hrbek is Fat

By the picnic table, Meggyesy's wife, Stacy, is breast-feeding their 2 1/2-year-old daughter, Erin.

I hate that motherfucker. Not only is he clinically retarded, he is an even bigger homer than Aikman. I'd rather have to listen to Irvin. Or Kornheiser. Or, dare I say it...PK. At least these fuckbags will say stupid things you can laugh at.

Last time I got caught humping my own face in public, I had to renew my membership on my states' sex offender registry.

First off......where is all this "she" nonsense coming from?

Mike Singletary has never been so proud.

@Armen Tamzarian: This should work out well for the Giants. Especially with all that knowledge and experience that Rosenfels has in their offense.

@vodkanaut: I wouldn't call him wholly "capable". He's never been anything resembling consistent. Last year was the best I'd seen from him yet. If that continues, then he should be a great addition for the Bolts.

@JohnnyDakotaStateU: Does he have a pending felony conviction that makes him a better fit than Jones was?

Matt Leinart can now now continue his adult film career without being criticized by that Jesus-freak Warner.

I don't see an option for measuring fecal matter released per stall. What's the point of all this unless you can see which bathroom has the least-used shitter?

@Milbury, Rolling the Dice: Omar did have a thing for them young hispanic boys. You may be on to something here.