Stereotypes aside, minivans offer more practicality than the average SUV while getting better fuel economy. The only real-world sacrifice you make with a minivan is that you can't take it offroad, but nobody goes four wheeling in new SUVs anyway. It's a shame that minivans, America's most sensible vehicles, have to be…

I assume you must stand up in your car too.

Hey guys, can you tell me where the Cadillac is?

No. Part of the problem today is that driving is effectively a right in the U.S. It is almost impossible to NOT get a license.

When I was 16, I thought I was an excellent driver. I could weave through traffic, cruise at 90, just barely make every yellow light, and never get a ticket or crash.

Now, about ten years later, my car finally died from years of rough driving, and my daily driver has changed to a '72 F100 with no power brakes, no…

But the empirical data doesn't bear that out.

1. "Distractions are part of driving" BS, I'm posting this as I am driving right no ... $2ffg4hhhhjhj hrjhhrth

Whenever possible, I move a bit out of the way to give some space to splitters. If I can get a biker to flash me a peace sign, then I am doing my part to make a bad commute suck less.

About #5, if you don't want me to rev or swerve, how will I impress the chicky-dos who I would otherwise most certainly bang with? Rev rev = bang bang. Straight up, panty dropper. Ker-plunk. Chicks will follow in their automobiles to where my bed is. That is how I know it would go if I had a bike, but that'll have to…

Pfft, I see your "Wall of Death" and raise you one Lion Drome

Shit. I'd rather die in the S-Class than be seen in the Smart.

Several passengers interviewed said the bird deaths were the "most pleasant" part of the entire United experience.

"and member of the Abu Dhabi royal family"

Considering how much tech from the racing program goes into the road car, not really.

Well, here's the thing. I was raised by a guy who raced motorcycles. I grew up at the racetrack, around bikers and gearheads and things motorized. I was taken to car shows because I thought they were fun. I really like cars and I like to drive the fuck out of a good car. I have dated more than one guy for his car —…

Just look at how desperate they are!

It's a good thing I shop for cars based on what I want in terms of performance and style, then.

I think something to do with the cat's anus, probably.

Martini Jalopnik!