Yeah, those professionals on the field should be real men and play without gloves too.

A fantastic first pitch for Heath Bell's Arizona career.

Jesus, Canada, enough already. We get it: You're really polite.

Pete Gaines: dick. Chipper Jones: dick. Deadspin: Publish those pics!

In reference to the new technology, the U.S. coach coincidentally summed up most of the country's sentiments about soccer:

"beer snobs might be the worst people in the world."

The Yankees even apply their overpaying for former all-stars strategy to their beer purchases.

I feel a need to defend Leinenkugel's since it is a local microbrew as I live an hour from their HQ. I also swear by a couple of their main brews. Summer Shandy is not their best beer, but it is one of the only ones you can purchase outside this area and it makes sense for a ball park since it is only brewed during…

I should have just done this before.

Go easy on the guy, Tom, he's not that big of a prick. Heck, when he heard the security guard sobbing afterward that without a job she couldn't afford her knee operation, he re-signed her to a 6-year, $100 million deal and legally changed her name to Allan Houston.

When did they become the Mississippi State Penis Pumps?

I have the Sunday Ticket, I pay a LOT more than that.

I'm not sure what your getting at either?

+1

This guy writes for Deadspin? This is clearly an April Fools joke by someone unaffiliated with the University. Why even post it???

True, but we got to cut the kid some slack. His parents named him Bryce for chrissakes. That shit ain't easy.

You have the right to your opinion, no matter how terrible it is.

As anyone who has ever been to US Cellular This is a prime example of "Know Your Core Audience".

It was easier watching Kevin Ware.

Well, Tim McCarver is retiring. This will be the last year I am paying MLB with my soul.