In this moment I wish I had a vagina to personally challenge you.

Come on, Jezebel, we all need to do our part to make Hilaria go away. Just say no! (To her never-ending yoga tweets!)

James Woods can eat a dick.

Elsa? Elsa? Do you want to build a Pussssssy??

Your argument is null and void because lentils.

Meh, its actually one of the best results for us since forever. We usually don't even make it to the finals with the crap we tend to send.

Also, congratulations to Conchita Wurst, she deserves it, it was a great song and great performance. Also, she should totally do the next James Bond opening song.

That's the one that destroyed me too. And now I'm wandering the apartment singing the song. It kinda fits: and we'll linger on, time can't erase a feeling this strong, no way your never gonna shake me, ooh darlin cause you'll always be the source of my botulism. . .

I thought it had more to do with her pandering to his vapid right-wing nonsense than his physical appearance.

Well, if the clothing is a publicity thing, perhaps matching Xmen suits next month?...

I thought I was dealing with Pink Ladies up in this piece. Turns out you guys are nothing but a bunch of Patty Simcoxes.

OMG, HAHAHAHA!!! Why isn't this the lead photo? Hahaha! dying.

Omg!! Tits in Tights, yesssssss!!!

A canned dress and flip flops.

Imma let you finish, but Vicodin is the best easy-to-obtain-for-back-problems opiate of all time. OF ALL time. (I would not recommend, however, that you take it when you go on on-line dates.) (Even if your disc is hella herniated.)

Everyone quit smoking! That's why we have Vicodin.

How is krokodil not winning?! It is the future AND it has gasoline in it!

Jack Daniels over Absinthe? JACK DANIELS OVER ABSINTHE? I mean, to be fair, I doubt everyone has had the magical absinthe moments that I have been lucky enough to experience. One time I got wasted on it at a Peter Pan themed college ball where I was DRESSED AS TINKERBELL, i.e. an actual green fairy, and spent a good…

Yes! Vicodin is my pick for winner and I can't even vote for it. Also, this gif will never get old.

HE LOOKED LIKE A GOD. #landoforlife