I can’t imagine a more suitable resume for the job.

Aww yes... Time for the old VW, vs new VW strategy.

Does the Chrysler 300 suffice?

Let’s make an exception for this one. It’s too good to pass up!

That’s clever! I certainly wouldn’t expect a truck like that to be hauling anything but the usual:

I usually find mine in the trunk when it’s raining. I’m pretty smart.

I wonder what his tire pressure was.

I see you did nothing illegal at all. Do you have any ID I can see?

Kind of bothered me that they asked to see his ID after it was obvious they had no reason to be at his residence.

I thought it might be amphibious

Dear Entire Town of Dearborn, Kansas,

My wife and I were just at Carmax a couple weeks ago looking at some vehicles that would transport 6 people in comfort and did not contain the word minivan (we’ve owned an Odyssey since 2005). The sales guy showed us a few and let us test drive several. Prior to that I asked if these had extended warranties available…

Stop it so hard the rust all falls off.

Best piece of prose by far

Soon, we’ll be able to start tracking her movements. We can tag her, follow her by satellite, and monitor her migration patterns. We will learn how many are in her herd, and if they’re collecting the core materials of caramel to bring back to their home habitats.

“whom we all called Caramel Lady. ”

I’ve been enjoying the BCO series so much, but with this statement I’m afraid you’re dead to me now.

“That would be a puddle of cheese, and we don’t do that” is one of the single most perfect server quotes we’ve ever had here.

I thought he was just replacing a light bulb.

I'm fully aware that this post is 3 days old but I had to chime in. The mortgage crisis and subsequent financial crisis had nothing to do with 30 year fixed loans. If we stick to talking about just mortgages (and not even getting into rampant HELOC abuse), the whole issue started with adjustable rate mortgages (ARMs)…