The best I can do are boots and a bag.

No but squatting next to the scale will - according to my friend :)

One of my best friends is black, and he said I don't need any more black friends.

Canadians are apologetic even when they needlessly insult people on dating websites.

My kids' district does this - the elementary schools start at 7:45, middle schools at 8:15/8:30, and the high school 8:45 or 9. They manage to have after school sports (very successfully) and all manner of activities. I think it is terrific.

"Excuse me, can I help you? Are you visiting someone?"

All 3 of these friends are assholes.

My boyfriend helps the plane take off and stay in the air by staring intensely at the fasten seatbelt sign until it is switched off. You're also welcome.

As long as the sleep wasn't Ambien induced.

And dealerships still wonder why people despise them...

Not even ashamed: I am fascinated by the temperature outside on flights. I want to point it out to everyone around me. DID YOU SEE THAT?! That's COLD. No shit, me. You're thousands of feet in the air.

Weird, I typically fly Delta for long enough trips where they give us personal TVs, so maybe they don't charge us since the tickets cost more than the rent on my house.

Or, how will we simultaneously watch Law & Order (seat-back style) while crushing mad candies (phone) and pinning (tablet)? It takes three screens at all times.

Oh god I hope not. Watching the flight path on the seat back screen is the ONLY thing that keeps the plane in the air when I travel, I'm sure of it.

The 2nd one I figured, the 4th one was my thought initially but then why suddenly follow up with a "hey are we going to do this thing?" out of the blue. Like we had not made plans; it was a vague "oh yeah there's this fun activity." If not into me, why follow up when I certainly hadn't messaged him after the date?
I…

Out of curiosity, why did you think your ex boyfriend would call you to tell you he was engaged?

If I ever went back into the dating scene I'd have to find a woman who won't think that because I haven't texted in an hour that our date is off. I only check my text messages a couple times a day because I don't/can't answer texts while at work.

It's always interesting when you learn the explanation. One time a guy I'd been flirting with for months called to ask me out on a date. He sounded really nervous and excited, like he'd been planning the call for awhile. He said he was out of town and wanted to take me out to dinner when he got back. I was like "hey,…

That, ladies and gentlemen, is what a hero looks like.

I mean, as a non-monogamous person, yes, I love meeting new people. I've also never found online dating to be that much of a hassle - sure, there's bad dates between the good ones, but that's to be expected, & if you grab a drink on the first meet you can always leave after just one & then you've only spent like an…