you're bat-racist.

Why can't the simple answer ever be "They're just self absorbed narcissists with the personality of an in-grown toenail?"

It would have been more intriguing if Guy Fieri and his hair stylist had been there.

What does her nipple being shown have to do with anything? It's a fucking nipple.

My cousin Claire is essentially a brunette version of Gwyneth Paltrow, right down to the fat-shaming, macrobiotic monomania and $200 cashmere socks. She gives out mini boxes of All-Bran cereal to trick-or-treaters in her fabulously wealthy Toronto neighbourhood, I shit you not.

You are neither judge nor jury, it is not your duty to "expose" these women, at least some of whom have likely been falsely accused. Get therapy for the hero-martyr complex that causes you to focus on the alleged issues of others, rather than the very clear issues of your own, and you may be surprised just how…

Colton is NOT a hipster name. That is a white Southern suburbs name. Colton plays JV football and attends Vacation Bible School. Get with it.

When he was 4, my son informed me that neither he or his sister would be answering to the names I gave them and that I should start addressing them as "Lightningburn" and "Captain Butterfly," respectively.

Some of them don't. I think some of the names you list are fine enough, though. Eyelet and Journey and Whisper are always going to deal with some jokes, and I really hope Ball doesn't have an easily mocked last name. But Sia? Zinnia? Farron? Those all blend in well with the background radiation of what people name…

My 8th grade diary talks about how Ryan kept trying to feel my "muffins" during the make out sess at the grade camp.

Never, whore.

I would read that over seeing this dumb movie any day. In fact make this movie about a bug that gets super popular by wearing white gloves and pearls. Yea, then I would watch the shit out of it.

She may not know. Her husband may not let her out of the house . . . .

FML hardcore.

never forgetting that a girdle can be a girl’s best friend.

Would she tell you her birthday? Or did she just say, "well, you know, I didn't really exist as a person until I married Randy, so can I just tell you our anniversary?"

Whatever the case, a potential GOP slogan: Do as I say, not as I do.

THIS IS GREAT NEWS FOR ME.

That is true but comprehensive knowledge of sex and all things attached also makes you realize how risky sex can be if they payoff isn't "worth it" and makes you feel empowered.

Hey you guys! This is what I cooked up this year. I felt really holy all night long.