oh jezzie.

"It’s a special kind of girl that does porn, and it’s usually somebody that’s had a horrible childhood. "

...is that really christina aguilera? She was amazing!

I'm going to just leave this here as a testament. I just got it for my son because he looooooves Iggy Peck Architect and it's super awesome. If you have any kiddos on your list for the holidays :-)

He looks like he scribbled his beard on with a Ticonderoga #2 pencil.

I've taken my husband to the ER twice because he couldn't poop, that's love!

My cat's litter box is in the bathroom and he loves pooping when I'm in the shower. The humidity traps the smell and envelops you in it.

Ha! Well, you know, there's always natural selection. ;)

Dylan,

Oompa, loompa, doo-ba-de-doo, I've never seen a couple as orange as these two.

Duckface? Lipgloss? Both?

Um, it's called "respect", okay? If you respect your partner, you'll pretend to be a robot who services him at will.

Any marriage where you feel weird about pooping in your own house is not a strong one.

I wish I could ban this gif from the internet. HISSSSSSSSS, AWAY WITH YOU, CREEPY BABY HEAD. HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

Boohoo, Kanye. Boohoo.

All I do is take a buttermilk pancake recipe and add a touch extra flour, a cup of pumpkin puree and 1 teaspoon each of allspice, cinnamon and ginger. It makes them a touch sweeter, so though the kids like syrup on it, I like just using some honey butter on them.

I make these every year on the first Sunday of October and my kids lose their damn minds when they come down and see them. Pumpkin buttermilk pancakes for the f-ing win.

My mom is a fucking MASTER of the silent treatment. The rest of my family would rather scream at each other and get everything out than go silent, but she'll just straight up not speak to you for days. It used to piss me off. Now I kind of think the way you do - if she can't use her words, I guess I don't care about…

Holland Taylor called dibs.

I never realized how much Maggie Smith could play Ann Richards.