This message is approved by my daughter ingesting her first cake (and taste of sugar) on her first birthday.

How about keeping shit private, Kate Gosselin? Who the fuck moves into the woods after being on a reality show because everything went well?

Maybe if we stop giving every stupid thing Justin Bieber does attention, he'll eventually go away.

Obviously, Meghan, the praying mantis with the bloody fangs was an oil well, a symbol of the Republican party's "Blood For Oil" philosophy. Conversely, Tegan and Sara represent the other end of the ideological spectrum.

I had a dream that my husband was eaten by a parking ticket machine. It was sad but also hilarious.

Holy shit if I can't sleep for the next few weeks so help me god I am tracking you down...

Miley needs a seat. I'm so damn tired of her. Go away, child.

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE INTERVIEW THE BLACK WOMEN that Cyrus used in the performance and get their story. or even THEIR NAMES.

So yea, I'm black, and definitely not supportive of anything that has anything to do with Miley

I get sick of white people talking about diversity. You're white. STFU.

Gretchen Carlson reveled this week that she was not allowed to wear pants on Fox & Friends. Yes, it is 2013.

Why does she have the frozen faced look of a woman in her Fifties, isn't she like 29?

Raise your hand if you thought the hedgehog was going to be playing the wrecking ball.

Maybe it's cause I'm taco-wasted but this is the funniest thing I've ever seen.

The tongue. The tiny feetsies. The FATNESS. Hedgehog, you are my spirit animal.

Can't bring myself to go over and look.

Considering peasant women and slaves used to toil for like a million hours a day up in the field and still manage to have kids who got to do the same thing, pretty sure the weight lifting is okay.

I'm surprised pregnant women aren't forced to be chained to beds for nine mouths to ensure that the baby is 100% safe because women are just baby incubators and we have to protect the unborn precious little angels. *massive eye roll* What is this shit, the Giver?

It's not necessarily an age thing. If you're a tall woman, or a woman of color, or, heaven forefend, some sort of combination thereof, you are perceived as "intimidating", and up-talking is a tactic one can use to defuse the perception.